"Argh! Writing an online dating profile! You'd think there'd be an app for this by now."
It would go something like this....
I'd tell you that I'm funny (sometimes intentionally, sometimes not so much), smart, and the life of the party. I like seeing live music, going to museums, walking around NYC, [etc etc]. Then I'd tap "START" and it'd pair me off with you.
You are warm, funny and fit. Like me, you're looking forward to a beach vacation but are also cool with a cozy night in. You love that I'm in love with my two fantastic kids, and understand that our relationship has to have room for them, too.
Isn't technology wonderful?!
Tap "contact me" [or whatever it's called] and let's get this App started.