Turning Sadness into a Second Chance

by Tamar Caspi under JDate,Online Dating,Relationships,Single Life

Dear Tamar,

I had a fairytale marriage — I got married the day after high school and had the absolute dream husband. Sadly, he passed away in 2006 after 23 years together.  I can’t or won’t ever forget him but I don’t think men will want to discuss him. He is obviously a part of my life that I will always cherish (an added bonus is that my 19 year old son looks exactly like him). How do I approach this delicate situation?

Dear Sadness to Second Chance,

First, I am so sorry about your loss. It sounds like you had an amazing marriage that most of us can only dream of and no one will ever fill your husband’s shoes. That said, you are right — men you date probably won’t want to talk about him, at least not right away. I think you need to be honest and mark your JDate profile as “widowed.” When asked, tell men you plan to date that you’ll be happy to share your story at a later time once things progress. Let them know that you are in a good place now and ready to date and meet someone to share the rest of your life with (or share quality time with, depending on what it is you are looking for), so that men won’t have to worry about your emotional state. Everyone out there has some sort of “baggage,” especially, and I don’t mean any offense here, the older you are.