Connecting Online

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Dear Tamar,

I am 52 years old, was married for 22 years and now I am single. I would very much like to have a meaningful, passionate relationship. I just don’t know how to go about connecting with someone online. Whenever I find someone I’m attracted to I don’t know what to say. I don’t want to come off being too forward or too aggressive. I don’t enjoy playing games, I just want to be honest about how I feel. What would you advise me to do when I want to make a connection with someone online? How should I approach the individual? I want to be smart about it. Thanks!

Dear Connecting Online,

Thank you for your very eloquent letter. You could basically post a version of your letter as your “About Me” paragraph which would attract the right type of people. See my example:

I am 52 years, was married for 22 years and now I am single. I would very much like to have a meaningful, passionate relationship. I don’t enjoy playing games; I just want to be honest about how I feel. I don’t want to come off being too forward or too aggressive but I’m not sure how to go about connecting with someone online. (And then add more about yourself: your character traits, hobbies and what you’re looking for in a mate.)

The same goes for any email you send a potential date. Let them know that you are new to JDate and have a hard time ensuring that your real personality comes through online but that you think you would enjoy each other’s company because of x, y, and z reasons. Your email doesn’t have to be too long or too detailed. Keep it short and sweet and you won’t have the chance to come off too forward or too aggressive. Once you meet in person I believe you’ll be more comfortable so try to get off-line and in-person as soon as possible. Good Luck!