Change It Up

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Dear Tamar,

I am wondering if there is something wrong with my profile or if I need to do something to it to get a little more attention here on JDate. I consider myself to be an attractive woman, I’m a grad student, I have a lot to offer, but I do not get a lot of quality guys contacting me on JDate. Any advice on updating/changing my profile to attract the right type of guy (more serious minded) would be greatly appreciated!

Dear Change It Up,

Anytime you’re looking for men who are more serious-minded to give you attention you need to reassess the vibe you’re putting across via your profile. If your photos are sexy and provocative then men will not take you seriously. You don’t want to look like a nun but you don’t want the photo to be all cleavage and skin either. What attracts men most is a great smile and eyes with some depth. Your About Me and other paragraphs shouldn’t be too flirty either. But, at the same time, you don’t want to come across as either desperate or boring, so you need to find the middle ground. Once you’re on a date you can crank up the flirt factor somewhat but waiting until the guy gets to know you before really turning it on would be most beneficial to you finding a guy who takes you — and a relationship — seriously.