Far-Reaching Fling

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Dear Tamar,

I met someone on JDate in another country and actually met him recently when I was in his country on business. We met twice during that trip and since then we’ve kept up a friendly relationship via e-mail. Recently, I tried to learn whether he plans to visit me when he comes to see his family who lives near me or if he thinks our connection could be developed in the future since I’m already planning to immigrate. Thus far he’s only replied that we are friends and he likes to talk but didn’t refer to the future. I would really like to become more serious with him but I’m afraid to push him to answer me about his future wishes but I really want to know if he could be interested in me romantically? I would appreciate your help very much.

Dear Far-Reaching Fling,

I think your beau is probably a little hesitant to commit to someone who currently lives in another country that he’s only met twice even if you are planning on emigrating. Between now and the time you move to his country, stop putting pressure on him to talk about the future and just get to know each other better. You may find you’re no longer interested in him once you get to know him better or you may find that you’re now the “cool, no-pressure chick” he’s excited to spend more time with once you move. And, of course, make sure you’re moving for the right reasons.