Often times when people learn that I blog for an online dating website they think this means I would be a good person to get dating advice from. While I can completely understand what the perceived implications of my being a so-called “dating blogger” suggest I am always quick to point out that I am far from a dating expert.
During the past year that I have been a blogger for JDate I have always viewed my writing as a way to express my feelings about dating, tell dating stories and bring up dating related topics that I think are relevant. Furthermore, JDate has experts that write weekly blogs which give people information on how they might become better daters, answer reader’s questions and debunk popular online dating myths; therefore I have never seen my blog as the appropriate place to dole out advice.
Sure I have written many blogs where I have used a personal experience as a way to help guide people away from making similar mistakes; however I wouldn’t view these anecdotes as forums for giving advice. When I think a situation for advice giving I picture a person with a specific problem who is asking someone (a dating expert) for the best way to handle or approach it. In this scenario consideration isn’t necessarily given to whether the person you are asking for help has ever been in that situation themselves, or knows very much about the personality or past dating history of the person asking.
When I write a blog about a personal experience I often times, at the end, leave the reader with what I learned from an experience, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they will have a similar outcome or should handle things the way I have retrospectively realized I should have. In the end everyone is unique, and so are their dating experiences, and as much as I wish I could help my friends or anyone else with their specific dating problems I am perfectly resolved leaving that up to the real experts and trying to help in my own way by simply writing about my experiences and hoping that at least one person can get something from reading them.