Being a P.I. on JDate

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Sometimes when you meet a new prospect on JDate you feel compelled to do a little digging and put on your Private Investigator cap. My immediate reaction is to tell you NOT to Google! But I’ve recently heard some horror stories that have made me change my mind. You shouldn’t research someone to the point where you know more than they would have shared on the first date, because if you already know the answer why would you ask the question? It’s normal to ask someone if they were ever married but it’s not normal to already know they were married at 21 years old for 6 months. Conversely, if someone tells you they are divorced and your relationship is getting a bit serious, it is not abnormal to check the county’s website for confirmation that their divorce is indeed official. Not knowing someone’s name on JDate is kind of nice because you can’t look them up on Facebook. It’s kind of like forgetting your cell phone at home because you feel kind of free – it’s all out of your hands and you have no control and you just need to see where you end up. It’s okay to maybe get an approval from a mutual friend, but try not to ask for too much information. With JDate, you have been delivered so much information via the profile questions that you are already lacking in the mystery department and a first date ends up really being more like a second date. Don’t dampen the excitement by finding out too much!


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