The List

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

When I was 16 my best friend and I made a checklist of what we each wanted in our ideal man. There were about 75 items: 25 physical and 50 emotional/mental/spiritual. It was incredibly comprehensive, especially for teenagers. About 10 years later I edited the list and added point values. It may sound silly, but it kept me grounded. Being Jewish was worth so many points that if a man wasn’t Jewish then he wouldn’t earn an “A” (90%) and therefore wasn’t for me no matter how many other categories he fulfilled. Many other items were either deleted or edited including increasing or decreasing their point value as the item gained or lost priority in my mind. You may not need a 75 item list but it is worth your time to write down what you want in a mate and ranking the items. When falling in love we tend to become blind to their faults… or we see bad signs and choose to ignore them… but if you have a comprehensive list to measure the prospect against then you can keep on the right path.

Hint: the physical traits should NOT be ranked high on your priority list.


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