Archive for June, 2013

Love At First JDate: Shhh, I can’t hear my date!

by JenG under Relationships

I woke up this morning with absolutely no voice. As if I had been yelling or screaming or singing karaoke for hours on end last night. Well, part of that happened. The screaming part. On a first date, in a crowded bar, I found myself having to practically resort to sign language to answer my date’s questions. The music was loud and the people trying to have conversations around us, were even louder. It was hard to hear each other and when the date ended, I found myself only being able to understand and hear 1/3 of our total conversations. Isn’t that a shame?

Do: Meet for a first date in an environment that welcomes conversation. A place where you can sit at an appropriate distance from one another and be able to converse, and not scream, or result to playing what looks like from a far—a game of charades.

Don’t: Avoid going to places that are infamous for their noise or an environment that’s not well suited for conversation. First dates are about getting to know someone and if you can’t speak to each other and have to yell sentences straight into their ear, all you’ll get to know is the smell of their hair. If you’d like to go to a movie or a concert, consider that as an option for the second half of the date and start off somewhere more low key and quiet.

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3 Ways To Tell If She’s Interested

by Tripp under Relationships

I get a lot of guys asking me over and over how to tell if a girl is interested in them. There are 3 main ways to tell if she likes you and I will list them here:

1) She asks you questions.

This might be the #1 way to tell if a girl is interested in you. If she didn’t care about you then she wouldn’t bother to continue conversation. So, if you’re messaging a girl online or meet a girl at a bar, pay attention to your conversation. What kinds of questions is she asking you. Are they personal? If they are then you can be sure she has some interest. But, of course asking questions is not enough to suspect any serious interest. Which brings me to #2.

2) She’s touching you

Not enough men pay attention to this. Check to see if she is touching you. Maybe she’s touching your arm? Is she slapping you on the shoulder when you make a joke? Women are doing this to be flirty with you. When you meet a girl in person or on a first date, look for these signs. The more she touches you then the more she wants to be asked out or even kissed. More on that here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueYYtCQmlf0

3) She makes time to see you/talk to you

Is she texting you? Did she message you first? Does she want to meet up? CAREFUL! You could be friend zoned. But if she is giving you the above signs then she’s actually interested in more than friendship. Either way, look out for this big sign. Most guys let this zoom over their head. If she is trying to make time to see or talk to you then she wants to be close to you. Don’t ignore this because most women will not bother with any guy they are not interested in.

Next time you meet a girl, pay attention closely to these signs because you will know right away, how to take the next step. Good luck!


Can I “Flirt” Too Much?

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Hi Ms. Caspi,

I am new to this online dating scenario, but I am willing and excited to try. Question: can a guy hit the flirt button too often???!!! Can I pay you a compliment? You Are A Supernova!

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Hi Flirt,

First of all, thank you for the compliment! Now on to your JDate question: can you “Flirt” too much? Yes and no… you can’t click “Flirt” more than 30 times a day and you can’t send a Flirt to someone more than once. Additionally, you can only see your Flirts (as well as other emails) if you are a paid subscriber since they go to your inbox. The key is to try and find the Flirt message that either most sounds like it would come from you and your personality or one which matches what you think the person you’re sending the Flirt to would want to receive. You can see that someone Flirted with you via the heart/smiley face icon but you won’t be able to read which exact one was chosen for you (although knowing the person sent you the Flirt is usually more important than the actual content).  If you max out on Flirts in one day, then yes, you’re sending too many. Use Secret Admirer which is totally anonymous until the other person also says Yes or use Favorites to let someone know they are on your radar.


Hollywood Yenta Roundup: Drake, Max Greenfield, and Sarah Silverman…

by JDateAdministrator under Entertainment,News

1. Drake Gives Sneak Preview of New Album

Drake made a major announcement last week via Twitter! The Jewish rapper announced the release date for his next album, titled Nothing Was The Same,  Tweeting in all caps: “N O T H I N G  W A S  T H E  S A M E  S E P T E M B E R  1 7 T H.”

Even though the release date for the album is three months away, Drake is giving fans something to look forward to… the rapper has released four new songs in the meantime!

The fresh music, including songs called “The Motion” and “Jodeci Freestyle,” are super catchy and sure to be a big hit with fans while they wait for the album to drop. Check them out here.

 

2. Max Greenfield Returns to Crime-fighting

New Girl and Veronica Mars fans alike will be happy to hear Max Greenfield is filming a new movie!

Before he played the beloved character named Schmidt on New Girl, Greenfield played Deputy Leo on Veronica Mars, the cult classic show that originally aired from 2004 to 2007. Greenfield announced last week he will be reprising his role in the Veronica Mars film.

“I’m really excited about it,” the Jewish actor said. “Everybody is going to be going full force on this project and it’s going to be like a fun reunion.”

 

3. Sarah Silverman’s Dad Takes on “JAPs”

It appears the apple does not fall far from the tree when it comes to Sarah Silverman and her dad, Donald Silverman. Donald recently took on the new Bravo TV series Princesses: Long Island – and the term JAP in general – in an interview for HuffPo Live.

Donald, who is Jewish, let everyone know where Sarah got her acid tongue and sharp wit when asked about the term JAP. “I find the word JAP to be rather disgusting and it refers to selfish, entitled people who are Jewish. There’s probably other entitled, selfish people besides Jews,” says Donald.

When asked if self-identifying as a JAP is something new, Silverman responds, “That something is being an a**hole. To refer to yourself as materialistic and selfish — they just don’t get what life is all about.” Apparently, JFathers do know best!


Taking Risks

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

You don’t need to cross the Grand Canyon without a tether, but you should take risks with your dating life — the safe kind, the kind you can’t hurt doing (except for a little dent in your ego at the very worst), the kind pertaining to making contact on JDate. Go ahead and write that email to the guy or gal whose profile you’ve been viewing over and over. What do you have to lose? At a certain point you have to get over who should email whom first, or what the order of things should be, and just make things happen!


Love At First JDate: Wake Me Up Before You Let Go, Go

by JenG under Relationships

Letting go is often as daunting of a task as making the first move, in the first place. You may start to lose sleep over someone you really enjoy the company of not making a move to see or speak to you. Instead of figuring out what may have gone wrong, figure out how to make one last effort.

Do: Make an effort with someone who interests you. Instead of waiting around for them to ask you out or to speak with you, reach out to them. Often times, we get bogged down wondering why someone is not texting us or begging to see us again. It’s okay for us to contact that person and say hello: as a friend would do to another friend.

Don’t: Keep trying with someone whose monotone and continuous silence scratch your heart like a broken record. If you keep on trying to no avail, cut your losses and move on. Refrain from harping on someone who won’t give you the time of day or is putting in the amount of effort that you deserve: which is a lot. Please don’t forget that.

For more Jen Glantz: www.thethingsilearnedfrom.com

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Extreme Profile Makeover — “Orit”

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Get an Extreme Profile Makeover

Tamar Caspi Shnall is giving online profile makeovers. Today she’s tweaking the profile for “Orit.”

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Dear Tamar,

Many men view my profile, but so few write an email. Is this typical, or would it suggest that my profile needs to be revised? From my experience, writing first is no solution! Thank you.

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Hi Orit,

I’d start with revising your profile before assuming the lack of emails are typical.

PROFILE NAME
Your profile name starts out great… until I got to the jumble of letters and numbers following what otherwise is a cute phrase. I do however like that you reference said phrase in your first paragraph of In My Own Words. If you craft a different combo of letters and numbers which are meaningful (your initials and birth year perhaps) then that would be better than letting JDate assign some random code.

PHOTOS
I suggest taking a new main profile photo and using the other 3 as the supplemental photos. You look best when your hair is a bit more disheveled like in photo 3 and not so heavy on your forehead like in photo 1. Also, the fuzzy sweater in photo 1 is a bit overwhelming so I recommend not wearing it in the new profile photo or on any first dates.

IN MY OWN WORDS
I don’t have a problem with the brevity of your responses but there are other issues which could easily be turning men off. You reference moving to Israel next year — why would a man want to get involved with you when you have one foot out the door? You’re missing letters and punctuation in places which create confusing run-on sentences. For instance, under About Me, it should say “I also think outside the box” and under My Perfect First Date, it should say “Wanting a second date = a perfect first date” and under You Should Message Me If, it should say: “You want to.” with a period before taking on the final part. I would also add where your kid lives and if you have any grandchildren. Also, you seem very active and smart and should expand upon what you do in your free time and what you earned your PhD for.

DETAILS
This is where you are probably turning off the most men, because you’ve barely answered any of these questions. Even if you select every option, you should respond to more of these questions which detail who you are and what you are looking for. You don’t need to answer them all, but right now 75% are blank. Complete your profile to up the ante.


Extreme Profile Makeover — “Jason V.”

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Get an Extreme Profile Makeover

Tamar Caspi Shnall is giving online profile makeovers. Today she’s tweaking the profile for “Jason V.”

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Dear Tamar,

I don’t know why I keep getting put off on getting dates. Phone calls get put off as well. I have a conversation on the phone and I get the shaft. I am a sweet guy turning sour. Help!

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Hi Jason V.,

Perhaps your lack of response has to do with the type of woman you’re attracting with your profile. Here are some tips for making sure you’re drawing in the right kind of woman.

PROFILE NAME
I think your profile name is cute even though I’m not a huge fan of astrology (see “What’s Your Sign“). It shows that you’re not a typical guy and of course tacking on the acronym of the state you live in is also a great way to make your profile name personalized and unique.

PHOTOS
I’m not a fan of your photos although I applaud you for obviously making an effort to get new pics taken. Because the first 4 photos are all taken in the same place with the same outfit, it is more of a distraction than anything else. Photos 2 and 4 are basically the same photo just a frame off. Delete photos 3 and 4 and make photo 6 your main profile pic. Then take another 2 photos closer up of your face — in different outfits — and add them to the que.

IN MY OWN WORDS
I understand that you speak multiple languages and that English may not be your first language, therefore it is important to have a native English speaker review your paragraphs as there are many typos. You may even be able to spot them yourself now that it’s been a while since you’ve written them. From punctuation to lack of spaces, there are typos which are distracting. You answered the important questions and although many of your answers are short, they are meaningful. After making the necessary corrections you should be pretty good to go. The only answer I would expand upon is “My Life and Ambitions” because this is not the place where you simply say you want a great woman but what else you want for yourself. This is also the place where you talk about your kids (especially since they don’t live with you, you need to explain why) and how long you’ve been divorced and where you want your career to go. Again, double check you’re using words correctly (ie. “Amorous” is not used properly), since you’re not attracting the right women who respond to your date inquiries.

DETAILS
Delete your income and the word “some” under “What I Do” but otherwise your details and what you’re looking for is complete and varied.

Since you have troubles with phone calls, I think you should address that English is not your first language as a woman may not necessarily be able to tell from reading your profile and may get put off by your accent. Some women love accents, but all women want to know you have one ahead of time just as they would want to know your age, height and if you have kids. Address it in your profile so it’s not a surprise on the phone.


How to Get a Response Every Time

by Tripp under Relationships

A common question comes up when I’m coaching men on how to successfully get dates with beautiful women.

“How come she hasn’t responded yet?”

Now, this could be through online messaging, texting or even Facebook. Let me set the scene…

You get the girl’s number from online or maybe at a bar. You know the right move is to text instead of call (and if you don’t know the right move then check out my youtube channel for that answer http://www.youtube.com/trippadvice)

Back to the story…

You have the number and you’re ready to say something. You send that glorious message and…

Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

How come she hasn’t responded yet (you think for the millionth time).

Well I can’t tell you why she hasn’t responded necessarily, because I don’t know your specific story. But, I can give you some sage advice on how to get her to respond to your messages.

ASK A QUESTION!

Common sense? Maybe. But, how come I never see men ever use this amazing “technique”? If you want a girl to respond to your texts and/or messages then end the message with a question.

Give her a REASON to respond. She will need that in order to give a response. When we see the question in our inbox, phone, etc. it gives us purpose to continue communicating. Most guys end messages with stuff like:

“Hope all is well”
“Hope to hear from you”
“Talk soon”

Bad. Bad. Bad.

This will not necessarily garner a response from her. It’s a gamble. In order to keep the conversation moving ask her something and give her the REASON to respond to you.

I know what you’re thinking at this point. Well, Tripp, what if she doesn’t respond? Then what?

Well, at that point you’ve just given yourself a lot of well needed information. If she’s not keeping up with conversation and won’t bother to answer your questions via messages, then you can safely assume she (or he) is not interested and you’ve done something wrong.

Maybe your previous message wasn’t witty enough.

It’s possible when you met her out that you didn’t get her attracted.

At the least you now know to do something different for the next time.


Hollywood Yenta Roundup: Seth Rogen, Ben Savage, and Amanda Bynes…

by JDateAdministrator under Entertainment,News

1. Seth Rogen Scores at the Box Office

This is not the end for This Is the End.

Since opening last week, the film has earned $33 million at the box office, making it one of the biggest hit comedies of the year.

Written and directed by Jewish entertainers Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, the apocalyptic comedy stars Rogen and quite a few of his famous friends, including James Franco, Jonah Hill and Craig Robinson. The A-listers all play “themselves” and fight to survive after the apocalypse strikes while they’re at a Hollywood party. While that shindig may have been over, Rogen’s run at the box office is definitely not!

 

2. Ben Savage Gets the Green Light

Girl Meets World is officially a go! The spin-off of the popular ‘90s series, Boy Meets World, was picked up by the Disney Channel this week.

The original series followed Cory Matthews (played by Ben Savage, who is Jewish) through the trials and tribulations of growing up, but this new series will reunite Savage with his on-screen sweetheart, Danielle Fishel, as the parents of a tween daughter – hence the “Girl” Meets World title.

Twenty-somethings everywhere have been buzzing about the ’90s sitcom reboot since news of the pilot broke late last year. Looks like there is now reason to keep buzzing!

 

3. Amanda Bynes Makes a Rare Apology

Pay attention because this doesn’t happen often! In a rare move, Amanda Bynes apologized to Drake (her former celebrity crush) for calling him “ugly” on Twitter.

The Jewish actress Tweeted, “I’m sorry about the Tweets I said about Drake. I didn’t mean what I said. I hope to become friends with him instead of smashing him!”

So, with this apology in mind, is the 27-year-old turning a corner? Perhaps not. She Tweeted yesterday, “I don’t like leading people on. I will not date @drake ever. I only want to be his friend. I’m sorry that I insult him but it’s hard not to!” Something tells us Drake is now waiting for her phone call…