The start of a week with what is most likely amazing weather outside your office window while you’re stuck inside until late afternoon each day is enough to put a damper on anyone’s mood. Try to change the odds in your favor by booking at least one date this week. By having something to look forward to, you will perk up and while the week may feel like it’s draggin at first it will seem to have flown by in retrospect. While you’re at it, book a second date. One during the week and one on the weekend. How?, you ask? Use the Secret Admirer feature to let prospects know you’re interested and Favorite them and send them a Flirt. Men who see these clear hints a woman is interested should write an email. Women who notice a man repeatedly viewing her profile can also send an email. JDate works best when you’re actively using the tools they provide so stop browsing and start clicking!
Archive for June, 2013
If you’re dating a single dad this Father’s Day then what can you do to make sure he feels special, solidify your role in his life and in the lives of his child/ren? Try to sneak some special time with his kid/s to plan something special. Ask them what they want to do to make Dad feel like the amazing father he is. Breakfast in bed? Ask their input for a menu and tell Dad to try and sleep in while you guys make a mess in the kitchen. Homemade cards? Try to find time to print pictures on glossy paper that says Happy Father’s Day 2013 and have them color the inside. A gift? Even though you’re not the step-Mom (yet) buy a small gift “from the kid/s” which will be meaningful to him (not socks, underwear, a universal remote control or a car wash). And under no circumstances should you take any credit or try to take the spotlight. He will know and appreciate the effort you put forth, so let the kid/s revel in the glory of their day with Dad.
Most of your problems can be solved when they are finally spoken out loud; when your closest friends pathetically judge them as you sit on top of your comfortable couch and blab about why something is not working out for you and how you desperately wish things would be a certain way.
Stop complaining, they will start off by saying until finally, after going back and forth for a little while, they will let you know that maybe if you want to change the way things are YOU need to do something about it.
Which was the case when I told my friends how I don’t get messages on JDate by the guys that I think are attractive and interesting. Their prime and dandy solution was simple: reach out to them.
- Do: Go after what you want and who you are interested in. Figure out what makes this person stand out and then tell them. Stray away from shy feelings and pump up your confidence level by reminding yourself what’s the worst that can happen? They won’t respond—so what?
- Don’t: Look at something that you desire and say I hope it comes to me. If you take that approach, you’ll be sitting on your couch, stuffing down a bowl full of popcorn waiting and waiting and waiting for nothing grand to happen.
Read more Jen Glantz, here: www.thethingsilearnedfrom.com
So, what’s the #1 thing that women want?
It’s not the easiest thing in the world to obtain but it sure does attract the ladies.
So how do we gain confidence? Well, you could hire a dating coach to help you (hint, hint) or you could read the rest of this blog post to find out exactly how.
1) Failure IS an option
The more and more we fear failure the less and less we try. And the less and less we try, the less likely we are to get ANY results. Without results we cannot build confidence. How do we know we can succeed at something unless we give it a go? It’s gonna take a few failures to get there so what are you waiting for? You see that cute girl online, message her. You want to say something flirty, go for it. In order to gain true confidence, we have to believe in ourselves and seeing success results is proof in the kosher pudding.
2) Drop the Ego Like A Bad Habit
Once you let go of your ego clarity comes your way. Your mind is free from the burden of excuses and negative thoughts. Your ego holds you back from taking action, taking risks and taking out the next cute girl on a date. In order to exhibit true confidence you can’t rely on the mess of your thoughts to stop you from ever making a move. The next time you come up with a new reason not to take a chance, don’t listen to your jumbled anxiety and read this blog post again. Remember, the only thing ever getting in the way…is you.
3) Take Baby Steps
In order to increase confidence in any area of life, taking the baby step approach will be your best method. Small steps will ensure you are headed in the right direction and constantly moving forward. To conquer your fear, take life head on, but one step at a time. Remember when you learned how to ride a bike? Did you just hop on and go? No, probably not. You started on the tricycle. Then, when you were ready, you got on the big boy bike. Remember, one baby step for you, one giant leap for your confidence.
Those are 3 surefire ways to boost confidence in yourself. You’re going to need it because the ladies dig it. Stop being unsure and get out there! Like I always say: Successful people do what unsuccessful people are unwilling to do.
Read more from Tripp here.
From The Bachelorette to Ready for Love to any other reality TV love show people are asking “when’s your birthday?” and then trying to see if their signs align. That was cute in Junior High when I had the big fat book Love Signs with post-it notes and scribbles in the margins, but in your 20s, 30s and 40s you shouldn’t even ask such a question unless you truly and genuinely believe in your astrological signs being compatible. Asking such a question, let’s be honest it’s usually from a girl to a guy, only makes the person asking come off as silly and immature sounding because chances are the other person doesn’t even know what their sign is. Once you’re in the relationship long enough you will find out their birthday on your own and if you are compatible signs you can maybe mention it in an off-hand, silly way as another sign that you’re a match!
He may be nearing 50 years old, but that doesn’t mean Ian Ziering has lost his ability to make women scream! The former Beverly Hills, 90210 star stripped down for his Chippendales debut over the weekend in Las Vegas.
“You guys are insane!” the 49-year-old actor (who was raised Jewish) told the crowd of screaming women. “Reminds me of all those mall appearances I used to do in the ’90s, except, back then, I couldn’t do this,” he said right before ripping off his white tank top and showing off his rock hard abs.
Ziering will be performing with the Chippendales crew throughout the rest of June. Here’s hoping he’ll be able to convince his former 90210 co-stars, Jason Priestly and Luke Perry, to join him at some point.
Don’t plotz, but Jerry Lewis is showing off some mad rapping skills… in the Yiddish language! TMZ recently posted footage of the Jewish comedian rapping in Yiddish while engaging in a rap battle with Chris La Vrar of America’s Got Talent fame.
Lewis, who is 87 years old, was apparently impressed with La Vrar’s rhymes, saying, “Very good. Very, VERY good… I want to do one now, in Jewish.”
It’s hard to tell exactly what Yiddish words Lewis is using, but one thing is for sure, he is leaving bubbies everywhere feeling quite verklempt!
It appears Amy Poehler is in Nick Kroll’s league – and no, we’re not talking about a storyline from his FX series, The League.
Kroll and Poehler made their public debut as a couple last week at AFI’s 41st Life Achievement Award Gala in Hollywood. Kroll, who is Jewish, joined Poelher at her table during the ceremony and reports say the two were were “super close and comfortable.” Talk about a comedy match made in heaven!
More statistics from the survey by Market Tools, Inc (who interviewed more than 5,000 singles over the age of 21) had to do with if singles are perceived as date-able when they are impacted by today’s economics. This being the “boomerang” generation (meaning many singles, couples, and families are moving back in with their parents after college, between jobs, or as they are starting new careers) means many 20 and 30-somethings refer to their parents as “roommates,” and may also have accrued debt along the way.
So, do these things still mean you’re date-able? Survey says… “Yes!” (with caveats of course).
- 65% of singles would date someone with debt up to $5,000 — although less so with someone who has high student loan debts to pay off
- 49% of singles would date someone who lived at home with their parents
Overall, singles want to date someone who has ambition. If you live at home and have some debt, but have a clear plan to get your life moving forward, then those things can be overlooked and accepted. If you’re in the process of buying your own home for instance, or if you moved home and have some debt at 32-years-old because you decided to pursue your dreams of going to culinary school after studying and working in another field, than that would be another good reason.
Laziness and irresponsibility is not attractive.
Most conversations I have with my mother ultimately lead to her asking for a schedule of any future dates I’ve agreed to go on. Which most of the time, my answer to her is explicitly simple and can be summarized in one of my most infamous and favorite sayings: I don’t have time.
“What do you mean you don’t have time?” She’ll demand, as if having a full-time job, perpetual errands to run, and an overwhelming desire for more sleep isn’t a good enough reason to name drop a phrase like that. “You’re just making excuses…this is your future we are talking about!”
Maybe she is right. Maybe “I don’t have time” is just an excuse for “I really don’t want to do this.”
- Do: Block out one day a week, if possible, for a date. That way when someone asks you out at the start of the week, you’ll have an evening reserved to give them a chance. If your life is off-the-wall busy, block out a few days a month until things begin to slow down.
- Don’t: Put dating on the back burner when a great opportunity to go out with someone or meet someone new comes to the forefront. Give someone a chance and be open to meeting people in the most bizarre places and situations—I’m very much talking about through online dating. Trade “I don’t have time” in for “I’ll give you a chance.”
Ladies, when it comes to dressing for a date, men want to see you look your best, but we also want you to be dressed appropriately for whatever activity we’ve got planned for you. Case in point, wearing heels to a park isn’t going to make for a great walk. You get the point.
Many women ask me what types of outfits men find appropriate but sexy, and where the line is drawn between sexy and “easy.” Here are some tips to help you get dressed for your big night out (or in).
1. The Coffee Date
Most coffee dates are going to take place in the daytime, so leave the cocktail dresses at home and go light on the makeup. If it’s during the day (and in the warmer months), showing a little leg won’t hurt. Also, hats could be a bonus if you have something that suits you well, i.e. fedora, beanie, etc. Cute summer dresses, or even your hottest work outfit, will do.
2. The Dinner Date
If we’re taking you out to dinner, we’re serious about wanting to get to know you. Wear something that shows off your best features, but nothing that makes it hard for us to hold eye contact. Dinner dates (or night dates) are the perfect time to dress up and bust out those sexy stilettos. Most guys won’t even know what stilettos are, but we do know that you will be looking elegant.
3. The Activity Date
Depending on the activity, there will be a good chance things could get active. This doesn’t mean you need to break out the workout clothes or Lululemon pants. Instead, throw on some leggings in case you need to be limber, and some flats so your footwear doesn’t limit you. In this case, comfort should be accounted for so your attention will be spent on us, and not a wardrobe malfunction.
4. The Surprise Date
These are hardest dates to dress for, because chances are you have no idea what the guy has planned for you. He’s trying to be romantic and mysterious, so he tells you to be ready for anything. By anything, assume it’s going to require you looking your best. A dress, leggings, or skinny jeans will all do as long you’re dressing to impress. This is a good time to go with something sexy over comfortable.
If you haven’t gotten the hint yet, then I’ll just tell you plain and simple: men are visual creatures. We get excited when we see a hint of skin or the silhouette of your body. But, we also want to be able to bring you home to Mom and/or Bubby — so always keep it tasteful.
Read more from Tripp here.
What do singles want? An online survey (taken by Market Tools Inc.) of more than 5,000 singles over the age of 21 said the first thing they judge about their date is… teeth. Why teeth? Teeth are an indication of your overall health.
So, make sure you:
- Floss the night before a date so your gums aren’t still swollen the next day
- Brush your teeth right before a date
- Pop a piece of minty gum in your mouth as you approach your date
- Don’t eat or drink anything on your date which will stain your teeth (ie. red wine) or smoke.
Even if you’re a smoker and your date is okay with that, try to not smoke after brushing your teeth until the date is over. You could have crowded teeth or a bad bite, but as long as your teeth are clean and white — and your gums are pink and healthy — then fret not, you will pass judgment.
Of course, you should floss regularly and brush your teeth twice a day and not smoke at all, but we all know that’s not always going to happen!