Archive for the ‘Date Night’ Category

Ladies, when it comes to dressing for a date, men want to see you look your best, but we also want you to be dressed appropriately for whatever activity we’ve got planned for you. Case in point, wearing heels to a park isn’t going to make for a great walk. You get the point.

Many women ask me what types of outfits men find appropriate but sexy, and where the line is drawn between sexy and “easy.” Here are some tips to help you get dressed for your big night out (or in).

1. The Coffee Date
Most coffee dates are going to take place in the daytime, so leave the cocktail dresses at home and go light on the makeup. If it’s during the day (and in the warmer months), showing a little leg won’t hurt. Also, hats could be a bonus if you have something that suits you well, i.e. fedora, beanie, etc. Cute summer dresses, or even your hottest work outfit, will do.

2. The Dinner Date
If we’re taking you out to dinner, we’re serious about wanting to get to know you. Wear something that shows off your best features, but nothing that makes it hard for us to hold eye contact. Dinner dates (or night dates) are the perfect time to dress up and bust out those sexy stilettos. Most guys won’t even know what stilettos are, but we do know that you will be looking elegant.

3. The Activity Date
Depending on the activity, there will be a good chance things could get active. This doesn’t mean you need to break out the workout clothes or Lululemon pants. Instead, throw on some leggings in case you need to be limber, and some flats so your footwear doesn’t limit you. In this case, comfort should be accounted for so your attention will be spent on us, and not a wardrobe malfunction.

4. The Surprise Date
These are hardest dates to dress for, because chances are you have no idea what the guy has planned for you. He’s trying to be romantic and mysterious, so he tells you to be ready for anything. By anything, assume it’s going to require you looking your best. A dress, leggings, or skinny jeans will all do as long you’re dressing to impress. This is a good time to go with something sexy over comfortable.

If you haven’t gotten the hint yet, then I’ll just tell you plain and simple: men are visual creatures. We get excited when we see a hint of skin or the silhouette of your body. But, we also want to be able to bring you home to Mom and/or Bubby — so always keep it tasteful.

Read more from Tripp here.

What do singles want? An online survey (taken by Market Tools Inc.) of more than 5,000 singles over the age of 21 said the first thing they judge about their date is… teeth. Why teeth? Teeth are an indication of your overall health.

So, make sure you:

• Floss the night before a date so your gums aren’t still swollen the next day
• Brush your teeth right before a date
• Pop a piece of minty gum in your mouth as you approach your date
• Don’t eat or drink anything on your date which will stain your teeth (ie. red wine) or smoke.

Even if you’re a smoker and your date is okay with that, try to not smoke after brushing your teeth until the date is over. You could have crowded teeth or a bad bite, but as long as your teeth are clean and white — and your gums are pink and healthy — then fret not, you will pass judgment.

Of course, you should floss regularly and brush your teeth twice a day and not smoke at all, but we all know that’s not always going to happen!

The internet gives us the best of times and it also gives us the worst of times. We can find out just about anything about the average internet user—AKA our new potential date. But how much information is too much information? How much intel is better learned through hours of in-person conversations and how much do we NEED to know beforehand?

• Do: look up someone briefly—just to make sure they are who they say they are. Search around until you have enough information to feel safe going out to meet this new person offline. Good sites to use for your search include LinkedIn, Facebook and Google.

• Don’t: Try to be an investigator. Don’t stalk through 5,000 of their Facebook photos, click around to find out information about their Ex, or waste too much time trying to find out every single crumb that makes them who they are. That’s what in-person conversation is for. It’s always awkward sitting across from someone, nodding your head and acting surprised when they tell you about how they were the varsity champion of their middle school soccer team—but you already know, because that’s how intensely you stalked them (guilty)!

Read more Jen Glantz here.

I’ve seen a lot of relationships end due to incompatibility. Let’s admit it, a lot of those online “tests” and horoscopes don’t give us the real answers. Through much conversation and research, there are three ways to tell if you’ll be compatible with your new date. It’s important to know right away… or your relationship could end in a disastrous break up.

1) Sense of Humor

If you two don’t have the same sense of humor, you can nearly guarantee the relationship is doomed. Connecting with each other on a deep level has to do with how you both perceive the world and it’s craziness. Do you laugh at the same jokes? Do you make each other laugh? Or maybe you are both serious and have no sense of humor. That’s good too! As long as both of you are the same level, then it will be a much smoother life together.

2) Taste in Music

Of course, I could have said anything here: movies, food etc. But, music says a lot about a person. Music defines our culture and our taste. If you two have different tastes  in music then it may be difficult to enjoy the many fleeting moments of life such as car rides, concerts or turning on the mp3 player at home. Be sure you look out for their taste in music and see how similar it is.

3) Your Drive

No, not the model of your car. When I say “drive” I mean for your passion and purpose for life. This is a big one because it can tell the future of your relationship. Do you both like to relax in the same way? Are you both hard working entrepreneurs? Is one lazier than the other? These are just a few of the things you need to look for in regards to compatibility. It may not be as important when you start to date, but as things get more comfortable each person will fall into their own ways. Be sure to know if your significant other has the same passions and zest for life as you do.

If you meet someone and you connect on all three of these levels, you can be sure your compatibility rate is very high. Make sure to look out for these details listed above on your next first date. That way you can get a good read on your future together.

There are people who “try” online dating for a month or two, and then call it quits. They will go back and forth through a series of messages, venturing out from behind the computer screen for a date or two (which inevitably won’t go exactly as planned), and then decide enough is enough. They then throw in the towel and resort to living a lonely life of sinking into the creases of their living room couch, playing unlimited games of Xbox, and ignoring calls from Mom — because all she will nag about is why her kid is wasting their lives holding hands with a remote control. Here’s when you should give up… and when you should keep on, keeping on:

• Do: Give the online dating scene a chance. If it doesn’t work out, maybe take a short break, and come back to it refreshed and open to trying it out again. Sometimes it helps to just revamp your profile, or spend some time rethinking what it is you are looking for in a person and how serious you want to take this experience.

• Don’t: Go on one or two online dates and call it quits. Most first dates will be a little overwhelming or awkward, but that’s why there is sometimes such a stigma around first dates. Either decide to go on a second date with someone who has potential, or keep searching and corresponding with more people until you find someone else who sparks an interest in your head.

There is someone out there for everyone — the number of different types of online dating sites just reinforces that! Give it a chance, or two.

Read more of Jen Glantz here.

You have to be good at things to attract somebody. Yeah, you’re good-looking and make a good amount of money, but can you play the ukulele? You probably can’t, and that’s the point. Nobody can play the ukulele. You can be that guy. I’m pretty sure the only living ukulele players are overweight Hawaiians.

Take up a new vocation or hobby. This will be a great conversation topic once the conversation stops and you know an elongated awkward silence is about to begin. You can nip that in the bud by saying, “I collect hair from barber shop floors.” This will momentarily break the oncoming silence, but it will also break any chance you may have had with the lady.

Just be different, in any way you possibly can. She’s already been on at least twenty dates with someone exactly like you. You thought that by dressing nice and taking her someplace unique would earn you points, but she’s already been to that place, and men always wear that exact shirt. Get a new shirt. Your lucky shirt from high school has holes in it, and you’re just now questioning why you ever considered it ‘lucky’.

You know that story of how your parents met? Whether true or not, it always has some sort of odd element missing from every other love story. No mother is going to tell their children that she met their father at a Red Robin after he was five minutes late and requested that they split the check.

It is very difficult to force myself to write a post with my fiancée lying beside me.

Do I write about how to date successfully? I am pretty sure I am supposed to, but I’ve been blessed with such good looks and white teeth that I don’t need to know how to date. I just show up to places and people just give me things. Dates. Money. Financial tips.

I think I have this burden where I’m supposed to use my knowledge after 200 something blog posts about dating to help people out. Since I know nothing about dating, maybe I could have spent the last 2+ years helping in some other way instead of just jacking around. I could have told you guys that brushing your teeth works most effectively if you wet the brush before and after applying the paste, or I could have told you that ear plugs work best if you wet them before insertion. I think most of my advice stems from wetting things before using them. Maybe those two things are just coincidence.

But no, I don’t believe that I am very good looking, but I work every day to make sure that I’m at least presentable, whether it’s before seeing my future wife, going to work, or even going out to eat by myself. Caring about how you look can do wonders. If you have low self-esteem, you will still have low self-esteem after a shower and a shave, but you will smell better. Nobody has ever disliked anybody that smelt of Irish Spring and Old Spice.

On the first few dates, if you’re a male, try to be at least a little bit decisive. It shows initiative or something.

I’m very bad at doing this. Although I have opinions, often very strong ones, I’m too afraid to express them, especially while out with a woman I hardly know. In general, I almost never talk about politics. I don’t shop around for things. If I need a shirt, I go to a store, pick up the first shirt I see, pay for it, and put it on my body. If someone asks me which insurance I prefer, I say, ‘The one that I pay to insure me in case I do something bad.”

On early dates, I have a bad habit of asking the woman her opinion on what she wants to do, where she wants to eat, what I want to wear, etc. Sometimes, you can come up with something, too. Set something up. Get a general idea of her likes and dislikes, and make an informed decision based on these opinions. If she’s a vegetarian, don’t go to a Brazilian steakhouse. If she’s a carnivore, go to a Brazilian steakhouse. If neither of you are hungry, do something else.

This all seems like obvious advice, but for me, it took a long time to learn. There’s a thin line between benevolence and weakness. I live my life on that line. I still see myself as an a****** that just can’t say no. Maybe there’s no such thing as nice people. There’s just a******* that impose their will and a******* that don’t.

I saw a list on the local news the other day that showed things and activities that intelligent people prefer based on a recent study. One of these things was curly fries. So now the world knows. Smart people like curly fries.

Maybe I’m stupid, or maybe I have a really skewed idea of intelligence, but I’ve seen some pretty stupid people eat curly fries in my life. My friend in elementary school liked to stick curly fries in his ear. I don’t remember who it was specifically, or where he is now, but my guess would be prison. I think the researchers just approached college professors and asked them if they enjoyed curly fries, and they were like, “Sure I guess.”

So, if you’re on a date with someone, and they eat curly fries, that’s a keeper right there. Hold on to them. They are one of the smartest people you have or will ever meet. Try to let them talk, and if you must speak, be sure that the topic is either politics, science, or fried potato products. Don’t be intimidated. Watch C-SPAN or something. Also, if you feel you can’t sustain an intelligent conversation, try to set the date at a place that does not serve curly fries, because not only do smart people like curly fries, but eating curly fries makes smart people even smarter. Every time you fry a potato, the batter and oil in which it’s fried unleashes atoms that are structured differently than others, and rushes encyclopedic knowledge straight to your brain once eaten.

And while smart people like curly fries, dumb people write inane blog posts about smart people liking curly fries. I typically prefer non-curly fries. I’m not sure what that means, but I think it just means that I like regular french fries better. I think it’s probably better to measure intelligence based on intelligence rather than on fried snack foods.

Does it matter where you go on a first date? Will you judge someone negatively for choosing an inexpensive restaurant, or will you think more highly of someone for choosing a pricey restaurant? The cost of the food shouldn’t matter, but rather the quality of the restaurant (plus the initiative your date took in choosing the restaurant) and the originality of the venue.

I love The Cheesecake Factory as much as the next person, but it’s not where I’d want to go on a first date. A fabulous hole-in-the-wall sushi spot is awesome, even if the bill ends up being under $50. And just because a guy takes you to an expensive restaurant on your first date does not mean that’s the type of dates you will always go on.

First dates are an opportunity to impress you, so people tend to pull out all the stops. Don’t be upset when the dates don’t continue to be so fancy… it’s not the cost that matters, but the quality of the person you’re sitting across from.