You know those nights? The nights you can’t remember with friends you’ll never forget? And no matter what your vice of choice is to make the seven deadly sins more appealing, you end up trying to erase the little parts of the night you can piece together. Unfortunately for you, in this age of great technology, your brain has adapted to the DVR mentality, and you watch scenes unfold like a bad rerun you can’t erase. All in all, was the sin worth spending the following day in hell? Of course, so long as you indulge in moderation, right? But then again, in California where less is almost never more- moderation is a term that’s almost extinct. So, maintain the modest mentality and indulge every so often. But just remember, if you want to play- you’ll most certainly have to pay.

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I have this thing about dating dudes from California. Sexperience has proven that L.A. dudes are too busy scamming on their next target, or too career focused in their twenties to play late on a school night. Occupational hazard? Sure, we’ll go with that. Luckily for me, most gents from Los Scandalous move here to make it in the big bad world of the industry! It’s like the universe understands my needs and wants and is flooding my city with a myriad of male options (and since, unlike NYC, we can’t order any type of cuisine at all hours of the night, I will settle for picking designer dudes). So far, I’ve dated dudes hailing from (in no geographical order,) Colorado, Montana, South Dakota, Georgia, New York, Pennsylvania and Virginia (and lets include Canada just for fun).

Now, math was never my best subject, but I’m pretty sure seven states down means I have forty-three to go – and then plus the additional provinces (not to mention three territories offered by Canada for my shopping needs) I should plan on finding a great guy by 2037. Really, it’s like I’m pacing myself. After all, this is a marathon – not a sprint, girls! I’m a teeny bit nervous about dudes from Texas, but I’m thinking SXSW Music Festival would be a great first date. I now venture out with the girls over the hill and through the canyon and expect to meet bros from various area codes, but sometimes you find the occasional L.A. born and raised boy, and when you meet one in Hollyweird it’s pretty much confirmation that hell hath frozen over. Dates from different states serve simply as a process of elimination and a kick-ass lesson in cross country etiquette!

 We may love the Seth Cohen a la The OC type, but you can’t beat Southern hospitality, or small town charm, or Canadian manners. Really, I’m just waiting until the Internet catches onto the phenomenon and picking out designer dudes is as popular a practice as ordering custom kids, or cuisine at all hours of the night (and in the comfort of your home at that!). So listen to Phantom Planet and follow in step potential boytoys hoping to star on the silver screen, “California Here We Come” can be the new male mantra! You may not score a part as the star in the next cinematic masterpiece, but you could wind up as somebody’s leading man.

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The dating scene in uber sunny So Cal is great for a million different reasons, namely the variety of options it offers its chic inhabitants when it comes to courting. This week, I suggest taking a break from those haute Hollywood nights and heading over the canyon and straight to the beach! Just because this swine flu sitch has utterly cramped my would-be sun-soaked Cancun extravaganza, does not mean it will keep me from enjoying a little fun in the sun. Come hell or high water, I am getting a tan this summer and I am trading in my porcelain persona for a not exactly redder is better type deal, thanks to industrial strength SPF. One of my fave parts about California is our thousands of hideaway beaches begging locals only to come and bask in the often too strong but oh-so-tempting UVA. Just make sure you and your date, or friends, stock up on the post excursion aloe, because getting high on sun stroke is a less then likely way to score a second date with your little beach bunny. See you at…well, I’m not giving away my favorite place to frequent, so find your own! I do promise a beachy-keen time, where the people watching alone is incentive enough- of course, that holds true for almost every Los Angeles locale.

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Over a year ago, fresh out of a long distance relationship with no holiday plans, I decided to give the JDate Puerto Rico trip a shot. Since I had never been to Puerto Rico and I love salsa and Latin influences, I figured how bad could lying on the beach in 80 degree weather with some MOTs be? Let’s just say I had low expectations.

Impetuously, I boarded the plane for Puerto Rico. On the first night, there was a big meet and greet dinner where a sweet, attractive, successful guy named David approached me. After several minutes of flirtatious banter, I was grinning…until he mentioned he was from California. Having just ended a bicoastal relationship, “LA David” was the last thing I was looking for – I wrote him off as “GU”– Geographically Undesirable.

The following day, as I met many new friends, I engaged in a variety of conversations, including a debate about the merits of the best baseball teams (White Sox, of course). My newest girlfriend was bewildered by my devotion to the White Sox, especially because her friend David (my flirting partner from the previous night) had expressed the same devotion and connection to the team. Based on some key elements of our conversation, she suggested David and I further get to know each other. Her reasoning?  “You are RELATED.” “Huh? I think I know who my family is.”  Well, apparently, I was wrong. It turns out, David was a third cousin I didn’t even know existed!

Fortunately, the upside was at that particular moment in time, I wasn’t open to long distance and didn’t even consider the possibility of David (in that light). The other upside? I met someone who has not only become a great friend, but someone special in my life that is part of my family tree.

Having 80 degree weather lying on the beaches with some salsa action Would Have Been Enough… But I was blessed and ended up meeting an amazing friend and cousin who I plan on having in my life for years to come.

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