Another Social Media vs. JDate Rant

by Tamar Caspi under Date Night,Online Dating,Single Life

Social Media — Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and blogs — has given people a false sense of self-worth. Post a pic and 98 of your closest friends and acquaintances will instantly “LIKE” it. Add an event to your timeline and people whom you haven’t seen in more than a decade will comment about your dog dying when you run into them on the street tomorrow. But check out this real-life scenario:

You’re on JDate, you are following my advice by poly-dating, and after a few dates with a few different prospects, you add or accept invitations to add these prospects on Facebook.

Then one of the more promising prospects stands you up on a date and what do you do? Well, naturally (enter sarcasm here) you take to Facebook to rant about being stood up. You use word like “rejection” and “desperate” and “soul mate” and “self-worth” and other extremely exaggerated terms to describe how you’re feeling right at that very moment about something that, in the long run, will end up being just a memory among millions… less than a drop of water in the ocean.

Except… all the other prospects now see that “Status Update” and are totally turned off. Not only is it clear that you are more into someone else, but you are now outed as a poly-dater (there’s nothing wrong with poly-dating, just don’t go around promoting it), and as an unnecessarily emotional single who likes to broadcast their baggage.

  • Bottom line: all these social media sites are public. Unless you block certain people from seeing your updates, then all your friends — and possibly their friends, and possibly the whole world — can see everything. Keep your crazy to yourself and call a friend to vent rather than hashtagging your emotions.

Anti-Social Media

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

A picture is worth a thousand words… especially when you post a photo of yourself scantily clad, drunk or provocatively posed (or all 3!) on Facebook, Instagram and other social media websites. When you’re single and are looking for a mate, is this really how you want to portray yourself to potential suitors? Summertime means less clothing and more opportunity for partying which means more chances to snap and post. Hold off. Those photos can be saved to someone’s device forever, they never completely go away. Have fun, sure, but not every action each day needs to be documented online. Are you representing yourself well? People you meet on JDate tend to do some background checking via social media sites so make sure you don’t ruin your reputation because of one crazy night.