I saw a list on the local news the other day that showed things and activities that intelligent people prefer based on a recent study. One of these things was curly fries. So now the world knows. Smart people like curly fries.
Maybe I’m stupid, or maybe I have a really skewed idea of intelligence, but I’ve seen some pretty stupid people eat curly fries in my life. My friend in elementary school liked to stick curly fries in his ear. I don’t remember who it was specifically, or where he is now, but my guess would be prison. I think the researchers just approached college professors and asked them if they enjoyed curly fries, and they were like, “Sure I guess.”
So, if you’re on a date with someone, and they eat curly fries, that’s a keeper right there. Hold on to them. They are one of the smartest people you have or will ever meet. Try to let them talk, and if you must speak, be sure that the topic is either politics, science, or fried potato products. Don’t be intimidated. Watch C-SPAN or something. Also, if you feel you can’t sustain an intelligent conversation, try to set the date at a place that does not serve curly fries, because not only do smart people like curly fries, but eating curly fries makes smart people even smarter. Every time you fry a potato, the batter and oil in which it’s fried unleashes atoms that are structured differently than others, and rushes encyclopedic knowledge straight to your brain once eaten.
And while smart people like curly fries, dumb people write inane blog posts about smart people liking curly fries. I typically prefer non-curly fries. I’m not sure what that means, but I think it just means that I like regular french fries better. I think it’s probably better to measure intelligence based on intelligence rather than on fried snack foods.