Sometimes you take a little break from the dating life because it’s just too damn hard to find someone that crosses the ex off the list. This little sitch is amplified in L.A. where ex’s are often not just around the corner, but in the background, on various stations, movie channels, and upcoming movie trailers. So as hard as you try to kick the bad habit, you’re lured back into the web by the offered comfort of consistency. If iPhone could find an app to block said images from sight, I’d be more than willing to jump the Crackberry ship and become a full-fledged Mac. Since that hasn’t happened, I’ve decided to live all things Amish. There are no movie trailers in Amish country. Of course, there are no cars to make a quick getaway either, but I hear the horses are being supercharged, so that’s a plus
Allow me to introduce you to a dating trend gaining more popularity than Michael Jackson’s parents’ house: friends with benefits. Mostly the arrangement is implemented when you find yourself in pre-nuptial purgatory, and the little label-less lover is a seemingly low-maintenance godsend. Suddenly, you’ve found yourself in the perfect relationship, and the only thing better than a boyfriend is the ease of speed-dial sex, guaranteed delivery within thirty minutes or less – and even Dominos has yet to perfect that deal amidst L.A. traffic. Plus, instead of carbs you’re opting for cardio, and saving money by not driving to the gym (your wallet will thank you later). Between the fabulousness of your new, easy affair, and freedom to find another lover with a later expiration date, women are learning the joy of this coital contract. If you read the fine print however, you’ll notice the tiny matter of heart v. head. You’re familiar with the case, you studied it back in high school (and a couple more times in college – but who’s counting). The little matter was crucial in implementing the new policy in which guys and gals establish guidelines to prevent the little nuisance known as love. Love is a complicated, high maintenance mess of a virtue that only serves to stress its victims into an early retirement from the dating game. Thus, the FWB arrangement was spawned to serve as your sexual savior. If only your iPhone had an app for that – we’d be completely self sufficient! So interview your available candidates, take ‘em for a test ride, and exercise the joy of the newfound fling freedom! Just be careful to uphold the lines in your little verbal agreement, lest you let love complicate your lives. Besides, it’s just until you find something better, right? Unless he finds it first.