After a major breakup you decide to make a big change in your appearance to make yourself feel better — you chop off 6 inches of your hair, you dye your hair a drastic new color, you grow a beard or shave your mustache, you begin manscaping, you get plastic surgery, you get a tattoo, and so on — but what is your motivation? Are you doing it to get your ex’s attention? Are you doing it because you feel depressed? Are you doing it because it’s what your ex complained about and you think the next prospect would want you to change as well? STOP. It’s never a good idea to do something major to your looks when your self-esteem is in the dumpers. You never want to make a drastic change — whether permanent or not — because of someone else. What happens if you get breast implants after your big-boob-loving ex breaks your heart just to meet a guy who loves you for you and your membership to the itty-bitty-titty-committee? You want someone who loves you for you — and any changes you decide to make for yourself.
Look good, feel good or feel good, look good? For some people looking good does make them feel good about themselves, for others they need to feel good in order to look good.
We all hear about beauty coming from the inside, and that’s all fine and dandy, but let’s be honest: When you’re single and dating you need to look good on the outside because sometimes your first impression is the only one you’re going to get. So yes, feeling good on the inside is going to emanate through and make you more attractive but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put forth some effort into looking good on the outside as well. Be the full package.
That means you need to take care of yourself. If you’re past the age of 40 and still single, or are single again after a divorce, then think about going to a spa to get some treatments. Dye your hair, get a facial, manicure and pedicure, try a facial injectible, have an aesthetician do your makeup, get a personal shopper to dress you and so on. By looking good on the outside, you’ll feel good on the inside and that will have a direct effect on your dating life. Many of these techniques will work no matter your age; just because you’re in your 20’s doesn’t mean you look as good as you could or should.
It’s not about being judgmental or superficial, it’s about being realistic. Think about that feeling you get when you walk out of a salon with a fresh haircut… now do what it takes to have that feeling all the time!