under Date Night
Did you know that you are the CEO of your own love life? This means you get to make decisions, choose how and when to take action, and hire and fire people as you see fit. This also means that sometimes, if sales are low, it might be time to generate new business. So in the business of love, how do you go about finding new clients to interview? Or if you’ve been in business a long time, what’s the best way to keep your brand relevant? Ok, enough with the metaphor – what do you do if you’re in a rut and feel like you have already gone out with (or are related to) everyone on JDate?
Do not give up hope! It’s just time to employ some new marketing techniques. Read on for ideas.
- Direct Mail — Or, as I call it, Flirt Bombing. This technique uses very low effort, but has a potentially high reach. What’s involved? It’s easy — see who is online or who has logged on recently and check out profiles that catch your eye. Then send a quick Flirt to let them know you are interested! While I ordinarily recommend sending tailored messages to more targeted profiles, Flirt Bombing is one way to reinvigorate your JDate action.
- Change Your Profile — Update your pictures or add something new to the “About Me” section – anything to earn the little “updated” button. People like new things — this is why stores and restaurants feature new or seasonal products. That “updated” button is like bait — it attracts attention, so remember to update your info from time to time.
- Change Your Search Parameters — Do what you need to do to reach your target audience. Just like it’s probably not a smart business decision for the advertisers of the Jitterbug cell phone to buy commercial air time during the MTV music awards, it’s probably not the best decision for a 55-year-old guy to be advertising to the under-30 circuit. At the same time, you don’t want to narrow your parameters so that your results decrease. My point is that it might help to tinker with all search options — age, distance, religiosity, etc. — so they yield new matches who are best for you.
- View Lots of Profiles — This is another passive form of bait. If I see that someone viewed me, there is a good chance that I will click on his profile. So generate more traffic by viewing more profiles. You should at least get some new visitors to stop by your profile.
And one marketing technique not to use: As much as I love a good coupon, I do not recommend using it as a strategy to drum up JDate business. A 2-for-1 is great for dinner, but terrible if you advertise this as your reasoning for asking someone out on a date. Similarly, advertising that your first date is free doesn’t really come across very well either. You might pick up some thrifty folks, but this may not necessarily be your target audience.
Anyway, try some of the aforementioned tips and you’ll be back in business in no time. And if not, well, maybe your bankruptcy attorney is cute and single!
under Online Dating
I do not like writing about myself. I do not like what I wrote in my profile. I am not one to blow my own horn, and therefore I get stuck when I do not know what to say about myself. Please help!
Dear Stuck On What To Say,
Unfortunately with internet dating you need to become your own PR firm. You need to get comfortable talking about your achievements, your goals, your past, your dreams, and even your faults. Ask some friends to help you by listing some of their favorite traits about you and write your profile from their point of view including the fact that you have a hard time tooting your own horn. It’s okay to be shy and humble but you want to make sure you’re not coming across as snotty or like you’re hiding something. Make sure you’re not only asking questions but answering them as well. Try to look at it this way — your date wants to get to know you just as much as you want to get to know him. And you’re not going to be interested in a guy who’s profile didn’t say much about him, so make sure you don’t make the same mistake. Just because you talk about yourself in high regard in your profile doesn’t mean you’re conceited and you can prove that once you’re on a date – but you’ve got to get the date first and you need to sell yourself in order to do that.
I recently attended a local JDate event to people watch and see if people knew how to market themselves without a computer screen separating them from reality. Sad to say, I was disappointed. Whether it means looking your best, putting a smile on your face, thinking about what you’re saying before you say it, or even how your nametag reads, everything counts and many people were failing on numerous levels.
Sometimes it’s general attitude. A few individual’s body language was so negative – arms crossed, shoulders hunched, sour look – that there was no way they were going to be approached. There were wallflowers left and right, people wandering through the crowd looking lost, others sitting down alone. You shouldn’t be ashamed to be at a JDate event because guess what? The people you’re meeting are there too! When you sign up for a JDate event, it’s time to throw caution to the wind, put yourself out there, lower any walls and find yourself some possible love interests.
Self-promoting is not an easy thing to do. We are not raised to be arrogant but, rather, humble yet confident so to talk about how great we are, how popular, how funny, how successful, how smart, how fabulous and so on is not natural. However, if you’re going to a JDate event then you gotta do it. You need to look your best, be outgoing yet natural, and not seem too desperate all at the same time.
The best thing about JDate events is that you should feel an instant kinship with everyone there and draw instant comfort from that. Everyone there is there for the same reason – to meet someone Jewish. Try to enjoy the opportunity of having hundreds of local Jewish singles in the same place at the same time with the same motivation.
More to come about what people show up looking like at the events in a few days.