The start of a week with what is most likely amazing weather outside your office window while you’re stuck inside until late afternoon each day is enough to put a damper on anyone’s mood. Try to change the odds in your favor by booking at least one date this week. By having something to look forward to, you will perk up and while the week may feel like it’s draggin at first it will seem to have flown by in retrospect. While you’re at it, book a second date. One during the week and one on the weekend. How?, you ask? Use the Secret Admirer feature to let prospects know you’re interested and Favorite them and send them a Flirt. Men who see these clear hints a woman is interested should write an email. Women who notice a man repeatedly viewing her profile can also send an email. JDate works best when you’re actively using the tools they provide so stop browsing and start clicking!
You’re single… you hate being single, you hate feeling desperate, you hate putting yourself out there, you hate being rejected, you hate having to sell yourself, you hate being single. But if you’re not putting yourself out there then how are you going to meet anyone? And if you don’t risk being rejected then how are you going to meet anyone? If you hate having to sell yourself then how are you going to meet anyone? If you hate being single then do something about it! You really can’t complain about being single if you aren’t on JDate and aren’t going to Jewish single shmoozers and aren’t asking to be set-up.
My friend Beth was just lamenting to me about how much it sucks being single. I asked her if she was on JDate and she said “not right now” and kvetched about the cost. I told her that she shouldn’t put a price on finding her Beshert especially when she pays that much to go out just one night. And even if you don’t meet your Beshert on JDate, the experience and mindset will help you on your other dates. She relented and went back to reactivate her membership.
Hopefully I’ll be able to put her money where my mouth is!
New data is out and it puts the odds in your favor:
-87 million. That’s the number of singles in the United States.**
-40 million. That’s the number of singles that have tried online dating sites.**
**US Census Bureau 2011
Try to wrap your head around that number – forty million. That’s a lot of people! Granted, Jews only make up about two percent of the U.S. population… but still, that’s still a huge number!
It’s my people watching skills that have left me baffled about the numbers game. The guys I saw on JDate were not the same guys at the single’s events or volunteering with Jewish Family Services. I would randomly meet Jews I had never before seen or met at bars whom had never been to a Jewish event! That means those people were not upping their odds because they weren’t as involved as they could be. It was better for me because I was doing it all and was meeting them all, but I wouldn’t be surprised to find that many of those people are still single today because they’re just not doing everything possible. Of course, I met my husband at a random bar after agreeing last minute to go with a friend to a birthday party while I was vacationing in Tel Aviv, so my theory proved itself.
You HAVE to be proactive! I’m a living, walking, breathing example of how increasing your odds does work! I’ve heard all the excuses – you’re tired, you’re busy, you’re frustrated with being single and fed up with seeing the same faces over and over again. The first two are tossaways, but the last excuse gets me every time — remember, it only takes one new face!