Second Date Dilemma

by Tamar Caspi under Date Night,Relationships

Dear Tamar,

I met a new guy on Tuesday night and we liked one another…he asked me out for the following night, but I was busy so we scheduled a date for Saturday night. It’s Friday now and I haven’t heard from him. He had said we were getting together for sure on Saturday night so my question is, since he hasn’t called yet to make firm plans, should I call him or wait till he calls me? Thanks in advance.

Dear Second Date Dilemma,

As women we’re taught to believe that if we call a guy he’ll think we’re overly-aggressive and will scare him off. But, I say you have nothing to lose except plans with someone else on Saturday night. Go ahead and call him.  Be upbeat and cheerful and simply ask him casually if you are still on for tomorrow — but don’t turn it into a long conversation and don’t tell him you were nervous he was going to stand you up. If he doesn’t answer leave a message with the same question using a positive tone of voice. Chances are (I hope) that he felt the plans were concrete so he was going to wait until Saturday to discuss where to meet, etc. Guys can be a little dense like that and sometimes fail to realize that we ladies like to primp and prep, especially for a Saturday night — prime night — date. If he says no or doesn’t answer and doesn’t call you back, well that sucks, plain and simple. Hopefully he’ll call to apologize at which point you can decide if you want to give him a second chance, or he’s just a dud and you’ll remember that one awesome date, but I bet he just hadn’t gotten around to calling yet and that you will have an awesome date  tomorrow! Good luck!


Deep down Everyone Wants a Nickname

by RollingStone9862 under Date Night,JDate,Online Dating,Relationships,Single Life

Although I am now a JDate pro, I have to admit one thing – a couple months ago I wasn’t completely sold on the idea of becoming a member of the JDate community. Before I joined I had many friends who had enjoyed the experience and encouraged me to create a profile. During their pitches they would inevitably recount past dating successes and failures to illustrate the wide-range of people and personalities you can meet online compared to a crowded bar on a Saturday night. After hearing so many of their stories I began to see a pattern emerge in how each of them referred to the people they met and went out on dates with; it was never Jenny or Tanya or Michelle… they all used nicknames.

When I asked my sister, an experienced JDater®, about this phenomenon she informed me that the only way to keep all her dates straight was to take a characteristic or personality trait that was unique to them and give them a nickname based on that trait. So, for instance, the guy who studied biology would become “Bioboy,” the guy who went to Harvard would be “Harvard Boy,” and so on. Unless of course you had the mind of an elephant, she said, there was no way she could avoid confusing all of her dates.
 
When I eventually joined, I came out of the gates a little shaky but quickly gained momentum as I built up a rapport with “Med-School Girl,” “The Artistic Chick” and “Unemployed Nanny” before going out on a date with “Tap Dancing Woman” and then dating “The Runner” for a couple of months; and I’ve got to say that coming up with nicknames helped me develop a keener eye for noticing those little special quirks about the people I was getting to know.

My sister and I used to laugh about all of her dates, and the funny nicknames she gave them, but the truth is that she had the opportunity to meet so many different people on JDate that she otherwise would have never met. Ultimately, it is the members of JDate and their individuality that gave she, and I, that exciting opportunity. So, if you look beyond the funny names, and get to know the people behind them, you may meet someone on JDate who you can truly be happy with.