under Date Night
When you are newly dating someone it is NOT the time to discuss the drama in your life, nor is it the time to whine and complain about things in your life. I’m not saying to make everything sound wonderful and perfect, but don’t turn a date negative with your stories about how your friends are fighting, or your siblings aren’t speaking to each other, or your job sucks, or… or… or…
There’s the normal vent about your computer crashing before you had a chance to back it up one last time, but spend about a minute on things like that and move on. That type of vent is something everyone can relate to and empathize with — and may even have advice to help you. If the dating turns into a serious relationship then you will have plenty of time to be the sounding board for drama!
Everyone has “drama” in their lives, but try not to make it a distraction to your dating life. You could have a grandparent dying or a loved one battling cancer or you could have recently lost your job or your father may have recently decided to come out of the closet as a gay man after being married to your mother for 35 years or your sister and your mother could be feuding to the point of ex-communication and putting you in the middle or your dog just died or your house flooded or anything else that causes you to lose focus. These are things that bleed into your everyday life and can cause dates to become very sullen when you describe whatever it is your drama may be. Listen, EVERYONE and I mean, EVERYONE, has some shape or form of drama in their lives. It is not a conversation piece for your first date. If asked something, just respond “oh you know, family drama just like everyone else has. I’ll tell you another time.” Everyone can relate to that. Do not go into details. Once you hit the third date mark, or even later on, you can divulge. Allow your dating life to be the positive and use your date as the distraction to your drama rather than the other way around.