The science teacher called on me even though I totally did not have my hand up to volunteer. I got up in front of my whole kindergarten class as the teacher introduced me to the peers I already knew. Today, we were talking about differences (i.e. the differences between shapes, colors, etc.)

There were two circles drawn on the board. The teacher put a yellow square inside one and a red rectangle inside the other. Then she said, “Jeremy, how are these two objects categorized?” I answered, “By shape.” “Nope,” she answers. “Okay, by color?” “No” “What is it, Jeremy?” “I can’t think of anything,” I said. Then the whole class started laughing and pointing at me. I felt mortified. Not because I was being laughed at by a large group of people, but because this happened yesterday. I, a TA, was laughed at by a group of kindergarteners for being stupid.

I stood there, while kindergarteners laughed right at my face. I tried my best to think of how else those two objects could have been categorized. Have my past four years with no formal education made me stupider than someone who can’t tie hisown shoes without either crying or vomiting? No, this would not stand. “Excuse me. Sorry to interrupt in the middle of your lesson. I just…I cannot see how else those two objects are different from one another. I said ‘shape’ and by gosh, I will not back down.” “Oh. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have used a rectangle when I meant to use a square. I’m sorry.” Despite her apology, I don’t feel like I received emotional compensation for the gravitational strain that this will have had on my afternoon. “Can you please tell the children that I’m not stupid, and that when Michael Friedman told me, in 1989, that I have never been to Disney World® , he was wrong?” “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said.

Oh! This week, I also joined another dating site. So far it’s not very effective.

I recently found that I am the most miserable from 8-11 am on weekdays. Though many moments throughout the days of the week are accompanied by pain, depression, and hunger, none pack the punch of 8-11. Take 6 am. No, take it! Though I say that in jest, 6 am is one of the most miserable moments of the day. I actually usually wake up at 5:59 am, so that God gives me a moment where I think I have more time to sleep, and then slaps me in the face with His omnipresence in alarm form 15 seconds later. Is it not enough that I’m single? Is it not enough that I don’t allow myself to eat anything but turkey sandwiches?

Also, 6:10 am is equally horrible. That is the moment that I run out of breakfast to eat and have to face the harsh reality of five-and-a-half hours of hunger. However, the worst part of my day always starts at 8 am. 8 am marks the start of a three hour period where my pre-k to kindergarten class has the freedom to do whatever they want. Most of their work is done on the floor. The floor of a giant classroom where I must continuously sit down and get back up. This gets worse as the week progresses because I gradually lose energy due to my diet, until the point where I stand up and briefly see nothing but stars until I wake up again to the harsh reality of where I am. The first hour is bad. The second hour is worse. The third hour would be the end of me if it wasn’t directly before lunch.

However, this chunk of day is a huge weight that lifts once it’s over. At 11 am, I literally feel reborn every day of the week. I rebirth myself five days a week. After my rebirth, I look for sustenance as the three hours have drained everything inside of me. Everything after that moment is great. I am so happy the rest of the day, I don’t even remember the fact that I have to live it all over again the next day. I feel like I do after seeing a movie. You know when you think you can do anything? You have that sudden urge to call every girl you have a crush on and tell them? Do you want that moment to last for the better part of an evening? Next thing I know, I am all comfy in my bed, and look at the clock, and it’s 5:59 am.

As I have already mentioned, I recently started my first job in the education field. I am lucky enough to be in a class of three to five-year-olds. I soon learned that that is the perfect age group to teach. They are old enough to know how to walk and talk and are young enough to not know anything at all. They have no inhibitions. They don’t care what comes out of their mouths. They don’t understand concepts like ‘friendship’ and ‘anger’. Again, they don’t know anything.

Spending an entire day with a group of these people is akin to a bad acid trip. It’s like suddenly learning that an entire race of people, whom you thought didn’t exist, actually existed. They don’t care about anything. They cause all of my insecurities to surface. They constantly ask why I sweat so much. One child asked how I got so hairy. I told him that I got it from my dad. He responded by asking if my dad is a werewolf. That conversation actually took place. Yesterday. Afternoon.

If these children have taught me anything, and they haven’t, it’s that I shouldn’t be ashamed or embarrassed about anything ever. My insecurities on dates would pretty much disappear after a full week with these children. I bet about eighty 80 percent of my dates nowadays are spent worried about why I sweat so much. After a half hour with these kids, the only thing I will be thinking of on dates from now on is how happy I am that I’m on a date and not in an elementary school.

Dear Gems from Jen,

Should I make an effort to try and find my other half while I am constantly busy with med school? There really isn’t going to be a time in my life when I am not busy because I’ve entered a challenging field but I do not want to end up alone. Are there guys who are willing to be patient or are they looking for someone to be there 24/7? I guess that’s why many of us are online dating; because we cannot go out and meet people. Sorry, I am in a quandry.

Dear Medical School,

I can certainly understand your quandary; however, your life ambition is quite commendable! My suggestion is to add to your profile where you are in life at this point in time and where you hope to be in a few years. Being honest about your commitments is important, but don’t become so committed that you let the chance for finding your other half pass you by. Just let the people you are interested in getting to know better know that school comes first, but it won’t last forever.

I have a really good friend who ended up marrying a girl who was also in the process of becoming a doctor.  The two of them lived in different states and were still able to fulfill their individual goals while setting aside time for one another. They got married the very weekend she graduated from medical school. The two of them were introduced at the ceremony as Mr. and Dr. I thought it was endearing and I was quite amazed at how they made it all work! They are still married and in love and were able to find one another during a time in their lives when they each had time-consuming goals each wanted to meet. They were able to do it all and they made it work, so you can, too!

Signed,
Gems from Jen