under Date Night
According to Psychology Today:
“A man, looking at a woman for the first time (or a woman looking at a man) will respond to the way that person stands or sits, the way he or she smiles, or is quiet or animated, the way he/she responds to others, and to the way that person is groomed and dressed. That initial impression determines whether that person seems attractive or not. But the odd thing is that what strikes one person as attractive will seem unattractive to someone else. No one way of appearing will seem attractive to everyone. Not only that, what is attractive, or unattractive, to a particular person at a particular time may seem quite the opposite at another time and place. ”
What this means is that looks don’t matter. How pretty or handsome you are is not all that people take into consideration when they are deciding whether or not to approach you. And just because someone doesn’t approach you at any given time, it isn’t an insult to you. Basically, every instance is different. As long as you exude confidence and happiness, then you have done everything possible to put the odds in your favor of making every opportunity count.
A blogger from The Times of Israel recently posted an article called “15 Women Hotter Than Bar Refaeli.” It listed women such as Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Prime Minister Golda Meir and comedian Sarah Silverman. The point of the article is to show that what makes a woman “hot” is not just a gorgeous face or a sexy body, but brains and the ability to use them.
Looks are subjective; everyone has their own idea of what is sexy and what (or who) they are attracted to. However, brains, intelligence and ingenuity cannot be faked (at least not for long). You are going to click on someone’s profile because you’re attracted to their profile photo, but you’re going to continue being interested based on what’s beneath — so put more effort into getting to know your prospects before you determine that you are or are not interested.
As I type this a Victoria’s Secret commercial is airing just after a commercial for some reality show featuring young women joking around about breast implants to feel sexier. Such blatant sex appeal might be needed for corporate advertising, but when it comes to advertising yourself sex appeal is more of a mindset. Feeling comfortable and confident in your skin is much sexier than showing a lot of skin when you’re a single person seriously looking for your beshert. It’s not about showing your undergarments or baring skin or wearing clothes not meant for your body style. You know what is sexy? A great smile!
All the single ladies — listen up! This is for you. When getting dressed for a first date LESS IS NOT MORE. Dress sexy yet conservatively to show self respect. Skirts and shorts should go to your fingertips when standing. No one wants to flash that triangle of panty (please, please, wear panties) or have to constantly pull down their skirt to cover their cottage cheese (or, if you’re lucky enough not to have cellulite, then to ensure your skirt and not your tushie is touching the chair when you are sitting down). Tops can show some cleavage but there should be no risk of a nip slip and no bust spilling out on the table when you lean over. If you have to constantly adjust your top, pull up or across or down, then don’t wear the top. Your bra should at no point be showing, not the straps or the lace or the seams. If you are showing your legs, then cover your chest and vice-versa. Respecting yourself by respecting your body is sexier than any amount of skin you show.