Minutes after creating a JDate profile you’ll probably start getting a lot of views right off the bat. Being fresh meat on the JDate market means you’re feeling pretty hot right about now, but how do you convert the views into dates? And what do you do when someone else’s profile catches your eye?
First, use the JDate tools to your advantage. When the “views”, “flirts” and “clicks” are used and reciprocated, you know the other person is interested… now it’s time to make a move and send a message. But wait… I’m an old fashioned type of gal and I believe if the guy is interested he’ll make the move, just as if we were in a bar. So the women can send flirts to their hearts desire, but let the guy make the first move. So guys (or gals who don’t want to sit around waiting,after all, it is a free world), when you write your message make sure it is not about you! We can learn enough about you by reading your profile. The message should be about why you like the other person, what caught your eye and what you have in common. Make the message specific to the person you’re writing to and add a compliment or two for good measure. The message should be short and sweet, but at least three lines. And do not ever, and I mean never, copy and paste a generic e-mail, it’s always obvious!
If you’re on the receiving end of a message, you can easily check to make sure the writer actually read your profile by looking for specifics. If you think the writer is attractive, you like their profile and their message, then go ahead and write back. But don’t wait too long. You should reply within the next day or two, just as you would if the message were a phone call to return. The reply should consist of a thank you, a return compliment and your phone number. That’s it. Keep it simple.
Dear Gems from Jen,
I have a pretty simple question (I think). I never know what to put in the subject line of an email I’m sending to a girl for the first time. I’m sure the girls I’m messaging are getting a lot of emails from other guys as well and I want to be able to stand out. Any ideas, hints or tips???
Standing out from the competition is the key here. Not everyone is getting bombarded with emails, but you want to ensure yours are read. The subject line is the first clue that you have read through their profile. My best suggestion is keep it short and hit upon a common interest. For example, if a woman has the same religious ideals as you then something along the lines of: I agree with your beliefs regarding religion, seems like we have a lot in common. If a woman you are interested in is an animal lover try this: I enjoyed reading your profile, especially the part about loving animals. Or, you could let her know that you have the same feelings regarding animals and state; from one animal lover to another.
Stay away from subject lines that contain sexual innuendos and flattery regarding looks. Some men make the mistake of using the subject line as a pick up line. You don’t want to sound cheesy or creepy. In other words, don’t use the subject line to come on too strong. Women that are serious about meeting someone want to know that you took the time and energy to read through their profiles thoroughly. You want to stand out from the crowd and connect from the earliest point possible. The best way to do this is follow my suggestions above and let the women that you are emailing know you have something in common with them and that you are sincere in your interest.
Gems from Jen