Kids, I am about to experience the most awkward situation of my life. The Countdown to this moment is set for 72 hours from now. I’ve worked for this my entire life. All of the times I called Erica in junior high and asked her to go out with me. All of the times I nervously walked around and pretended that I was okay being the only person without somebody to slow dance with at Bar Mitzvah parties when I was not okay with it at all. All of the times I was in a movie theater with Sarah (that one just happened once).

Now kids, in order to understand the upcoming awkward encounter, we have to go back a few months. Maybe six months. Let’s say six months. Six months. I was about 60 pounds heavier, and my JDate pictures reflected that weight discrepancy. It was relatively more difficult to receive and maintain a conversation with a girl. I managed to talk to the same girl via IM several times, until she looked past my main profile picture that made me look a lot less fat. After she saw all of my pictures, she bolted and I didn’t talk to her again.

After I lost a good amount of weight, I changed my profile pictures. After the new me surfaced, the same girl initiated an IM with me. This was unprecedented. Was she only talking to me because I was thinner? Probably. Did I care? Nope. We talked several more times. We soon learned that, coincidentally, she was going to be in charge of the food at the wedding of two good friends of mine in a couple of weeks. We then planned a date together. I took her out to eat and see a movie. It was fun. After the date, I texted her thanking her. She didn’t respond until I texted her again the next day. She responded saying something along the lines of wanting to be just friends. Though it was pretty much what I expected, and I was certainly used to that rejection notice, I impulsively shot her a text saying that I would let her know when I got thinner. She asked why I said that, and I didn’t know really. We both somehow decided to be friends without really meaning it.

Anyway, the wedding is three days from now, and though this situation does seem like a crock-pot of awkwardness, anything involving myself should be taken seriously. Actually, it might not be awkward at all, unless, of course, she reads this post, which is entirely possible because I told her on the date that I was a blogger for JDate.

Sunday marked the 17^th anniversary of my mother and stepfather’s marriage. For making it this far, they received a congratulatory phone call from me. 

Quite cognizant at ten years of existence, I was still not precocious enough to obliterate my memory of the simcha with the aid of its open bar. Thus, I remember the proceedings quite well. What stands out in my mind most is the chuppah, the glass breaking, a limo ride from synagogue to reception, and radishes cut to look like blooming flowers. This was impressive imagery in the eyes of the child that I was.

I will admit on behalf of nearly all women that no matter how cool we are or appear to be, we give semi-regular thought to our future wedding day, no matter how single we are. While my goal in planning this event will be to avoid convention in the form of cheesy djs and windowless hotel conference rooms, I like the idea of carrying out the traditional elements of a Jewish wedding ceremony. However, my wedding will also feature broken glass of the inadvertent variety, as my friends can become sloppy when they are really happy.

Over the weekend I attended one of those rare (by today’s standards) weddings where the bride and groom are still excited about their relationship. The couple met three years ago to the day, meaning not so long ago that the nuptials were merely a legal formality. These guys are clearly still in love, and the pair made it clear in their vows that they believe their union, which began at a Purim party, was fated.

While I don’t know if my philosophies on life jive with pre-ordination, I do know that it was at least a terrific coincidence (or perhaps intelligent design of the bridal variety) that seated me at dinner next to the bridesmaid and her boyfriend. She and I got to talking, and I learned that we share a love of writing about love, particularly of the online Jewish variety. An exchange of emails means we may do so in a collaborative fashion in the future. To top off this excitement, she and her boyfriend are a match made in JDate heaven.

Meanwhile, during the reception, I conducted a textual flirtation with a coworker I’ve discussed here, with whom I’ve made amends, making jokes in a style terrifying to men about the gathering of tossed bouquets. When this traditional game of catch arrived, as always, I lost out due to my physical timidity, lack of hand-eye coordination, and perhaps lack of will. Because I do not have a real boyfriend, I was happy enough to be pushed aside by the bridesmaid, who is pretty serious with her doctor beau. I hope the very tasteful flower arrangement yields good things for this JDate duo.

My desire to meet a young Jewish bachelor in Hebrew class was not meant to be. The students are primarily comprised of women, and the retired-set. The hotties? From the looks of the Manhattan JCC’s brochure, they are likely found in the center’s fitness facility. (Little did the Pharaoh know that one day the Jewish people would pay to lift heavy objects).  It is probably for the best that my class is devoid of date-able distractions. Class is for learning, and an intensive language study will require my full attention.

In other news, I have a wedding to look forward to later in the month, of which many such qualified individuals are slated to be present. Perhaps I will do something different to my hair that day. This could be anything, since I usually do nothing. Is this why I am single?

As I mentioned previously, one of the best parts of my job as Founder of JewishWeddingNetwork.com is hearing all about how people meet.  This next story is by far the best JDate success story that I’ve heard.

Artist Maya Escobar was a senior at the School of the Art Institute of Chicago, when she attended a performance art class in which she discussed how differently she was perceived by Latino men, as compared to Jewish men. Jewish men thought she was exotic and labeled her a Latin sex symbol, while Latino men would be impressed with her accomplishments and goals.  Her professor suggested that as part of her studies, Maya set up profiles on a Latin dating site and a Jewish dating site, and document the process.

Maya joined JDate as part of a performance art piece, but that only lasted until she received an email from a guy named Loren. Loren had his profile up on JDate for two years, but didn’t pay for an active membership until he saw Maya’s profile.  Ironically, Maya had seen Loren’s profile a year before when she was just perusing the site, and thought to herself that if she were to meet someone on JDate, he’s the guy she’d want to meet.  Maya was attracted to Loren on many levels – he’s a musician and an artist like herself and it turned out that Loren had been head of UIC’s Hillel, where Maya’s brother went to school. The couple went on to graduate school together at Washington University in St. Louis, where Maya got her MFA and Loren is getting his law degree.

Loren and Maya, Photo Credit: Marv Chait

Yes, Maya broke the code of her project, but in a sense she didn’t.  Maya’s soul mate turned out to be the one guy who didn’t treat her in a stereotypical manner.  

Maya and Loren recently wed in a ceremony that incorporated both the Jewish traditions and the Guatemalan traditions of Maya’s heritage.  You can read more about Maya and Loren’s wedding story at JewishWeddingNetwork.com.

One of the best parts of my job as founder of Jewish Wedding Network is finding out how couples meet. I never tire of hearing the stories! I know a lot of people meet on JDate, but I don’t think I really realized how many couples meet on JDate until I launched a Jewish wedding planning website.

Mara and Adam are one such couple, but their online meeting was anything but ordinary. In 2003, Mara was just out of college and decided to dabble in JDating. She signed up for a subscription, but two months later let it lapse –and that’s when she received an important email from another JDater. When she looked at the sender’s profile, she thought he looked familiar. The subject line of his message? “You look familiar.” As it turns out they went to the same college, at the same time, were amongst only a handful of Jewish students, and had loads of friends in common, but had never actually met! Doesn’t fate work in mysterious ways?

Adam and Mara

Mara and Adam are an official JDate Success Story and are now planning their November 2009 wedding. You can follow Mara as she blogs about her wedding planning journey at JewishWeddingNetwork.com

My friend Polina and I go way back–all the way back to the 10th grade. When you’ve known someone this long, you’ve really experienced life’s ups and downs together. And in our case, we’ve been there for one another through the ups and downs of dating.

Polina and Sara at their 15 Year High School Reunion

Last year, Polina called to tell me the great news – that her little sister was engaged. At the time Polina was single. I had a funny premonition and told Polina that I bet she’d be engaged by the time her sister’s wedding rolled around. She laughed at the mere thought of it.

Just a few months ago, I had the satisfaction of saying “I told you so.”

Soon after our conversation, Polina met Jake on JDate. From the moment she mentioned him to me, I had a really good feeling. They are both Russian and come from the same cultural background, and neither one of them had seriously dated other Russians. Also, she loves outdoor activities. He loves outdoor activities too.  Um…did I mention I had a good feeling?

Jake and Polina

Fast forward eight months later and Polina and Jake are engaged. Their wedding is planned for September 2009 – three weeks after Polina’s sister’s wedding. Of course, her parents couldn’t be more thrilled with having a b’nai mitzvah – two daughter’s getting married within a month! As I predicted – Polina will be bringing her fiancé to her sister’s wedding.

Follow Polina’s story on Jewish Wedding Network as she plans her September wedding to Jake.