To avoid multiple-personality disorder or schizophrenia, you must wear suede when eating venison, you must wear pure cotton when roasting marshmellows, you must wear chaffron when you eat your chauffeur. When it’s his turn, you must have the chaffroff. You can’t eat corn flakes without listening to corny jokes on the radio, and you can’t drink Coca Cola without wearing an Uncle Sam get-up.