Comments on: Is it just me, or do men never write back?

By: Sarah

Sarah — Mon, 04 Jun 2012 17:03:38 +0000

I need to interject here and say my piece on this… I am a female who gets a lot of emails every day on dating sites, and I really just don’t know how to say “not interested” other than not responding… maybe this is juvenile or inconsiderate, but that’s what it comes down to. In fact I’ve gotten some nasty messages from men whose IM’s I declined saying “you must think you’re too good for me” etc etc. Do you (readers of this) really prefer a message saying “not interested” over no reply??

By: Stefansky48

Stefansky48 — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 23:46:59 +0000

I thought I was the only one not getting responses. In my profile I mourn the passing of common courtesy and I think the non-response syndrome is part of that trend.

Many of us (gender notwithstanding) find it difficult to make that first contact. I know it sounds strange to be shy about sending an e-mail but it can and does happen. Folks of my generation (Boomers) sometimes still harbor memories of rejection in face to face attempts at meeting people and, speaking just for myself, a non-response is just another form of that rejection.

I’m one of those guys with the terrific sense of humour that women are supposedly looking for. Not so much I guess. I usually will end my message with something like, “If you’re not interested, a simple “no thanks” would really be appreciated and I won’t bother you again.” Does it help? Not really…..

By: AlphaKid42

AlphaKid42 — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 05:20:51 +0000

Well, I wrote playful messages to six women that matched my profile quite well, and I heard back from none of them, so obviously the failure to respond is not limited to men. You don’t know why they don’t write back, but you do know they aren’t interested.

I think it’s time someone in this game shed some light on one thing: The way a woman looks is very important to a man who is looking to date. It by no means guarantees success in a relationship, but if the point of a profile is to get interest, your picture speaks a thousand words. Freud said basically, men want sex and he didn’t know what women want.

Get a bunch of different outfits and get some professional photos done, that show you as energetic, exciting, and sexy. Take the photos outside and ask complete strangers for a moment of their time. Ask which of the photos they find most attractive, then post them to your profile.

By: joel

joel — Sun, 10 Jul 2011 20:56:17 +0000

This is pure nonsense.
It has nothing to do with men being intimidated by women who make the first move.
Women do not answer men either.
It is very impersonal.
It is that we live in a disposable society and if there is no interest, then generally you will get no response. Manners and curtisy have gone by the wayside.
It is that simple.

By: Jake R

Jake R — Thu, 23 Jun 2011 00:18:26 +0000

Skip the girlfiends do you have any male friends or a sibling you can consult? If them ask them to review your profile and make comments on tone, content and whether the profile really refelects who you are.

Also, don’t be afraid to ask your audience for what you want. Many (but not all) the womens profiles that I read seen a bit vague to my male brain. There is a big difference in circular speaking and being direct. Men prefer direct. An ending comment that reads…..if I sound like what you are seeking, do not pass go, do not collect $200, come and get me….makes it abundantly clear.