The Hora-Scopes: Your January Forecast on Life & Love
Astrology 411: When reading your horoscope, it’s always a good idea to read your sun sign, as well as your rising sign. Your sun, moon and rising are the 3 main elements in your natal chart that are the footprints for shaping who you are. Your rising sign is the way you go about your life… it’s “how” you get to your destination. If this was a choose-your-own-adventure book, then it’s YOUR way of going about the adventure. Every rising sign does so in a different way and this becomes specific to each person. If you’re interested in finding out how your rising sign influences your life path feel free to contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Attention, attention. Calling all Aries. Mars will be going retrograde from January 23rd through April 14th. And since this is your ruling planet, wherever it is transiting in your chart you are likely to feel it more so than some other signs. This could be quite confusing for you Aries since we know you like to jump, then ask questions later. Hey, we appreciate you taking the lead, someone’s gotta do it, and you’ve got chutzpha! My advice to you is, start the New Year off with a bang and be as proactive and productive as you can. Then, after Mars goes retrograde, it’s a good time stop and think before you act. I know, I know… this is like asking a high school student to not check Facebook all day. You know what, so do I! Scratch that example! But, you get the point. If you want all your plans to be executed thoroughly, it’s better to pull back on the reins a little after January 23rd and start planning rather than acting on impulse. Sorry, don’t shoot the messenger (halo popping up over my head, wink wink).
Taurus, your patience has (finally) paid off and since your sign rules (among many things) values and self worth, it’s time to rediscover that your talents are in fact your true assets – once you believe in yourself, your inner wealth can turn to outer wealth! With Jupiter, the planet of luck and expansion, transiting Taurus until June (it’s a mitzvah!), profound opportunities and growth can be harvested. This is the kind of transit we’re all waiting for. Not only is real commitment possible when Jupiter contacts your sun, if it aspects your Venus you could be hearing wedding bells. Bim, bam, bim, bim bim bam. Oops, wrong song but if you’re gonna be walking down the aisle soon, I don’t think you will care what you are singing as long as you are doing it…and with great style of course. We can’t forget this IS Taurus we’re talking about.
Hi and hello Gemini. They say that actions speak louder than words but whoever made that up must not have been a Gemini. Words for you are an aphrodisiac. Hello, Shalom, Comment allez-vous? Do you have any Grey Poupon®? Say what? Well almost all words… Mercury is still transiting through Sagittarius, and for many of you this means it’s opposing your natal sun. This energy can make tensions run hot and cold, something I’m sure all you Geminis are familiar with. (Disclaimer: I happen to love the witty banter of a Gemini so I’m on your side, just have to state the facts.) Alright, now that I saved my tuchus, make sure you don’t burn the candle from both ends. Try to limit the heated discussions until mercury moves into the stable earthy sign of Capricorn on January 8th. This could save you a lot of apologizing in the long run. Thank you and you’re welcome upfront.
Cancer with the transiting sun currently in Capricorn, it is opposing your natal sun in Cancer. Oppositions manifest themselves in external events; one way for example is in that foouuurrr (errr 13) letter word called relationships. Imagine 2 people on a see-saw. One goes up, while the other goes down. You are doing the opposite while still working together. So if… (or when) egos start running a little high, remember you are not always right, but guess what, neither are they. So who is? ME. Just kidding. Final answer: both of you are. Are you getting where I’m going with this? Pretend it’s the final round of Dancing with the Stars and you and your partner are doing the Macarena or how about the Cha Cha. Who takes the lead you ask? Both of you. Just not at the same time… work it out… it’s a team sport, just like online dating.
I am Leo, hear me roar. Meow. OK, so we know your bark is way worse than your bite, or is it the other way around? Can you hear me now? Well we should because Mercury, the planet of communication, is trining (positive aspect) the late degrees of Leo. Human translation in 5, 4, 3, 2…. Leo, this is your dream come true! Mercury rules your speaking abilities and the trine to your natal sun ensures that you will definitely be heard… that is unless you have AT&T and in that case may the Schwartz be with you.
Calling all Virgos. Front and center (and in orderly fashion of course). Take note, Mars, the planet of action and ambition, is going retrograde (aka, appears to be moving backward) on January 23rd. And since most don’t speak ‘Astrology,’ I will translate. People born in the late degrees of Virgo will be feeling this more heavily. How does this play out, you ask? Mars is normally responsible for getting us out of bed and making us spring into action. When he goes retrograde, this physical actions turns to more of an internal dialogue with your psyche (sounds scary, you say… nah don’t worry). My advice to you: Take the time to gather all your resources and plan your steps before you execute your plans. Take some time and get your “ducks in a row” (wow, did I just say that? Should I send out an outlook meeting request next?) Shivers. Well, actually Virgo you may like that. Ok here is your meeting announcement… your meeting has been postponed, take this time to redecorate your cubicle and make your ‘to do’ lists. We will reconvene when he goes direct.
So you made it through the holidays Libra and by now, you either have Mr./Ms. Right or Mr./Ms. Right Now. Hey, what’s the saying? You have to kiss a lot of frogs before find your mensch? Well, with Saturn still hanging out in the late degrees of Libra (before it goes retrograde again) this could be putting a lot of pressure on you to find “The One.” Wait, don’t we already have Jewish mothers for that job? Hmmm, now we have 2 of them?? Either way, Saturn and my… I mean your mother will force you to get real with all these Mr./Ms. Right Nows. If you’re not feeling it with your ‘right now,’ time to step up that JDate profile of yours and see who is new and improved in town. You never know, you could be 1 click away from saying, “What’s happenin’ hot stuff” to the real kahuna!
Good news Scorpio. I swear. (Me: holding up white flag from behind the couch… I come in peace…). Jupiter is now in your solar 7th house (house of committed relationships) and remember, Jupiter expands whatever it touches. Yes, even your hips after the holidays might have had some lovin. But positive changes will be coming especially now that Jupiter is moving forward through Taurus. See that was simple and easy. You are now free to go back to your profile stalking. Carry on. As you were. I won’t tell. Scout’s honor.
Mercury is finally direct. Hooray! And it is still in your sign, Sagittarius. Since it is now moving forward and repeating the territory that it previously visited, what’s the saying?? Oh yeah, second time is the charm! (Well, it’s actually third time but that didn’t fit with what I wanted to say, so I made up my own rules just like you do so often dear Sag!) Big dreams, big ideas, big goals. Communicate them with all your heart. Say what’s on your mind (this is something I know you can do) and if others are not on the same page, then with the New Year maybe it’s time to move forward without them. There are plenty of others out there who want the same things that you do. As long as you say what you want, you will find it! I believe in you and again, not only because you are the luckiest sign… although that has something to do with it!
Happy birthday Capricorn! My you have a nice, well tailored and high quality outfit on today. (Do I know how to charm a Cap or what?) Speaking of status. Wait, were we talking about status? Well sorta, with you Capricorn it goes along with the territory and that’s a good thing because who else is gonna climb to the top? You are the mountain goat after all, and they didn’t just name you that for nothing. Saturn is in your solar 10th house (house of career) and since Saturn is your ruling planet, you have a mutual understanding with one another. With it transiting your 10th house, it is defining your career and bringing structure and form to it. This can be a great thing for you romantically as well because when you feel comfortable and stable in your career, it’s more likely that you are ready to meet your other half. And just think, since you’re already the goat of the Zodiac, you have plenty of leverage when it’s time to discuss your dowry.
Good news Aquarius, Venus, the planet of love and money, is currently in your sign and this opens the doors to that word, you know… it rhymes with knish… uh, no it doesn’t. I just couldn’t think of anything that was Yiddish (hey, I just did it!) Point being, (any day now…) L-O-V-E is in the air. Yes, with this beautiful planet conjuncting your sun, you can expect excitement and growth in the areas of love and money. Sounds too good to be true? Well, I promise you it’s not. Take advantage of this wonderful aspect while it’s there. And as our wonderful friend, Jerry Maguire, once said, show me the hunnies… or was it money?
Psst…Pisces, did I wake you? Real quick, before you doze off again; Mars, the planet of action and well, since this is a dating site, sexual energy (yes, I said it), is in your solar 7th house of relationships. This is your time to make it happen. No more head in the clouds. Let me break it down for you. Men: if this was a basketball game, and you were down by 2 points, and had 5 seconds left in the game, you gotta go for the 3 pointer for the win. Mars doesn’t go for ties! Ladies: imagine there’s a 90% off sale at Bloomies and you’re waiting outside for the doors to open, but then you find a secret door on the side that leads you straight to Jimmy Choos for $40 (hey, it’s my fantasy right now, isn’t it?) Your mars would go for it! OK, glad we are all on the same page. You have an opportunity to take a chance, go for it! Then afterward you can go back to your daydreaming, but wouldn’t it be so much nicer to do so while whispering sweet nothings in your partner’s ear? Dream a little dream of me…