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Hits & Mrs: 6 Tips To Keep Your Summer Fling Going Into Fall

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Summertime…and the datin’ is easy! Fish are jumpin’…and it’s time to catch one! This season is, in my opinion, prime time for dating. Work schedules tend to be shorter, vacations mean adventures with new people, and everyone beats the heat by showing more skin. So how do you turn a summer fling into a long-term romance?  Here are six simple tips on making your summer love last!

1. Party girls don’t make great mates

Summer tends to be filled with BBQs, parties, and drinking the night away. You need to make sure that you and the object of your affection are not just seeing each other when you’re wasted.

2. Spend time with his friends

When your social network becomes intertwined with his, it’s much harder for him to blow you off.

3. Start to plan things in the future

If he gets the sense that you are thinking of him as more than just a summer fling, he may be more likely to think of you that way as well. Suggest a concert or a camping trip that you could do together in October and see how he reacts.

4. Communicate the right way

Texting and emailing reduces interpersonal connection. Make sure you’re touching base by phone between outings. It doesn’t have to be a high school-esque all-nighter. Just show him that you’re a woman of substance who has interesting things to say.

5. Don’t be a good time girl

If you’re giving it up every time he sees you, and that’s pretty much all you do together, then the mystery in the relationship will quickly fade. Set the precedent early on. It’s much harder to back off than it is to speed things up.

6. Play a little hard to get

You don’t want to drop everything the minute you see your phone light up. Show him that you have your own life by being unavailable sometimes, but don’t be so elusive that he feels you are blowing him off. Men like a little bit of a chase. Give him enough to get his workout, but not so much that he’s exhausted.

Three signs that your relationship is probably not going to weather the season.

1. He refers to you as “his friend”

Summer relationships can be very casual so sometimes it is hard to know your status. It is actually a better sign to be introduced simply by your name than with the title “my friend” and then your name. Only saying your name means that they might have heard the backstory on you already so you need no introduction. Specifying you are his friend tells you exactly where you stand.

2. You see less of each other

If neither of you are making an effort to go on dates regularly, and he goes days without returning calls or texts, the summer flame may be burning out.

3. He starts to talk about getting busy – and not in the good way.

If all you are hearing is how much work and traveling he will face in the fall, he’s trying to let you down easy.

It is possible, however, to make a summer fling last. It’s hard for me to believe that my husband and I passed the 9-year mark of meeting online this past Independence Day. If you just take things day by day, and season by season, it’s remarkable how quickly times flies!

Dear Mrs D is an online dating strategist who has been seen on Fox, NBC and CBS, and has written an eBook called, “D is for Dating: A Guide to Successful Online Dating.” She also covers a variety of dating topics on her new radio & TV show, “Dates & Mates with Dear Mrs D” which streams live at 2 PM PST every Friday on CoolChangeRadio.com, and on Blog Talk Radio at 4 PM PST on Tuesdays.
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