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Maintenance & Mating: Are We Trying Too Hard To Prep For Sex?

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Women spend hours in salons, too much time in bathrooms, lunch hours scouring lifebooker, evenings squeezing in spray tans, eyelash appointments, waxes, mani/pedis, laser appointments and the list goes on. Some of us do this for ourselves, but a lot of us do this for men. In the beginning stages of dating, women feel the need to look ultra-attractive as they want to be ‘ready for sex’ whenever it may happen!

For many women, the process of being ‘ready for sex’ is more for the woman herself. A little pre-planning allows the woman to feel as attractive and confident as possible in her first hot and steamy encounter with her new partner. So what do men think?

Chances are your new man isn’t noticing your $50 French manicure when you are stripping down to your Victoria’s Secret undergarments. The only thing that you can be sure men will really notice is a recent waxing or laser appointment.

There is one question worth considering though: What do men think about excessive maintenance?

Maybe your long, hard efforts to create that smoky eye look with layers of mascara and liquid liner, mixed with a heavy set of fresh eyelash extensions and Mac´s new charcoal shade, are making you look as if you are hiding something. Those hard-earned dollars you spent on your golden organic spray tan from a salon like Completely Bare on Fifth might look great in your new Helmut Lang LBD, but your new man may not appreciate it all over his Egyptian cotton sheets in the morning. However, if you really need that golden glow to feel comfortable as it’s the middle of a frosty winter, I suggest you have your appointment a couple of days before your date and scrub a little with a towel as sweating and rubbing after date night could cause a disastrous case of streaky sheets. You want to take this advice in relation to facial and eye makeup too. What will your man think if you leave him with charcoal pillows, even if they are courtesy of Diorshow?

Another maintenance issue is the clip-in hair extension. Sure clip-ins look great across the dinner table, but what about when things start to heat up and get a little more passionate? What will your man think when he tugs on a hair extension that moves? Or worse, when he wakes up next to you and your weave is visible? One thing to consider is that fake hair freaks men out (particularly in sexual encounters).

So what can we take from this advice?

I suggest you keep it simple. Get your waxes/ laser and mani/pedi if it makes YOU comfortable, but think a little more carefully about all the makeup, dye jobs and fake hair. This does not mean go on the date looking like you just came from SoulCycle®. Instead, try to capture the essence of being fresh, clean and simple to avoid embarrassment

Janis Spindel is 6 Marriages shy of 1000, and she has been in business for 21 years! Specializing in pairing up upscale clientele who are well-educated, sophisticated, attractive professionals, including public figures and celebrities, this self-proclaimed Cupid in a Chanel suit is no-nonsense when it comes to the business of “getting people married.” For more info on Janis, check out www.janisspindelmatchmaker.com.
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One Comment »

  • Lauren says:

    I couldn’t agree with you more, Janis! After more years than I care to recount of going all out, I realized that no one even noticed, and I finally stopped. It turned out that the very best version of myself is still just as beautiful, but is far more laid back because I’m not stressing myself out over something that doesn’t matter. Men love that I’m so relaxed and natural, and I feel more attractive because of it! :) Thanks, Janis!

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