If the root of all evil is the failure to consider the existence of the other; and the root of all good is the recognition of the existence of the other, the all-purpose antidote would be the attribute of empathy – right? Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.
When we met, sparks flew from the first moment. Neither of us have ever experienced anything like it… he said the following:
1. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me in my sober existence
2. I have never had a better time than the time we spend together
3. You have so much going for you- you’re brilliant, beautiful, and you have a great career
4. We are two halves of the same whole
Ok, so when a man feels all of these things supposedly, how could he just let me go like that?
Your wedding day WILL be the most fabulous! Day! Of! Your! Life!
However, hindsight is 20/20. There may be elements of your wedding that you may look back on with regret or remorse. It’s never a fabulous feeling, but you should know that as long as you have love, that’s all that really matters.
Just in case, though, it might be helpful to learn what other been-there-done-that brides have to say about their weddings. The Wedding Yentas recently asked a group of married ladies: What do you wish you could go back and change about your wedding day or wedding planning experience?
“A person should never discriminate among his children even to the extent of a thread [garment] weighing only two weight-measures of silk, similar to that which Jacob gave to Joseph but not to the other brothers” (Shabbat 10b).
The elusive Homing Pigeon is a man who reeks of wanting to get married. He can be spotted from a mile away. A light bulb goes off in a man’s mind when he wants to find a wife, and he morphs into a Homing Pigeon. He might suddenly wake up one morning and realize that all of his friends are married, everything is about couples, and he asks if you’d be alright settling in Scarsdale.
Chanukah is neither directly ordained in the Torah (like Rosh Hashana, Passover, etc.) nor mentioned in any other biblical text (as Purim is in the Book of Esther). The Books of Maccabees are not included in the Biblical canon, because these events occurred after the sages had declared the Tanach (complete Hebrew bible) closed to further additions (around 250 B.C.E.). Writings, such as the Books of Maccabees, which have historical import but are not included in the Tanach, are often referred to as Sfarim Chitzonim (external books) or by the Greek term Apocrypha (hidden books).
…Sara and David grew up within 15 minutes of each other in southern New Jersey. They were both involved in the Jewish community growing up, but never seemed to cross paths.
I think back to that first date when I, frankly, was on the fence (he since has told me that he was too) and I wonder what would have happened if either of us cut it off at that point. So often we are quick to judge. Think of the times when you made a quick decision – either at work or with a purchase? How happy were you in the long run? Studies show that 55% of Americans believe in love at first sight, but with a divorce rate that hovers close to that number, maybe we need to rethink our way of making decisions about a potential partner.
I keep my basic criteria for deciding whether or not to go on a second date very small…
Have you ever heard of Yehudit (Judith), the daughter of Yochanan the High Priest, who saved her city, Bethulia, from destruction at the hands of the Syrian-Greek general Holofernes?
Chanukah always overlaps with at least one Shabbat (if not two), and since Chanukah begins on the 25th of Kislev and lasts for eight days, the holiday always coincides with the celebration of Rosh Chodesh(the new month of) Tevet. (Today, 30 Kislev, and tomorrow, 1 Tevet, are both Rosh Chodesh.) This is significant, because both Rosh Chodesh and Shabbat were loathed by the Syrian-Greeks and their observances were outlawed.