Bari Lyman, author of the new book Meet to Marry, has seen her share of rocky relationships, daunting dates and mystifying men. From the man who turned out to be gay to the guy with a drug addiction, it’s easy to see why Lyman used to describe herself as “relationship-challenged.” But at 35, she had an epiphany. Lyman realized it wasn’t the men who were the problem, it was her. At that point, the former JDater® embarked on an intense personal journey, examining herself and transforming the areas in her life where she had a relationship “blind spot.” After much self reflection and transformation, Lyman went on to meet her beshert on JDate. Now married, she says marriage-minded singles can have a lifetime love like hers simply by following three easy (or at least easier than you think) steps.
We have JDate to thank for bringing us together. Then, after dating a few months, we found out that two mutual friends were planning on introducing us. It really was beshert that we met at this time in our lives.
…her credit card was barely back in her wallet from signing up on JDate when we found each other.
Over the years, I‘ve learned some tricks of the trade to save as much time as possible while online dating. Call me a gold-digger all you want, but when I evaluate profiles, I employ a specific method of attack. First, I look at the pictures to make sure I can stand looking at him. Next, I go straight to the line that lists his profession to make sure he could provide for my future two children. Then I read what he has to say in the written paragraphs.
Hillary and I didn’t go on to JDate looking for soul mates, as we were just hoping to find people to have fun with, but soul mates are what we did find in each other.
Dear Matchmaker Rabbi,
I am wondering if I could get some insight in regards to being a convert attempting to be successful with dating Jewish men.
I’m almost 30 and feel like I am running out of resources and options. I have developed a great relationship with the members at the local Temple. I have asked my rabbi and was advised to try the black Jewish community. I did and was unsuccessful, as I have a feeling that the Jewish men I encounter are not so sure about dating me, as I haven’t completed conversion yet.
I also have had Jews consult with their rabbi about dating me as I do impress/scare the men to the point that they have to do so. I also participate in Jewish community events, as well as Jewish dating events, in order to ‘put myself out there’ so to speak.
1. Is it appropriate for a Jewish man/woman to date a convert while the convert is in the process of completing their conversion?
2. What could a convert do in order to show that they are dedicated to Judaism and all that entails, during a date, without having to regurgitate all of the information that the convert has spent years learning?
3. Would it be best if a convert just wait until the conversion process is complete before attempting to date a Jewish male/female?
4. What advice could you give to a convert who is trying their best, yet keeps getting rejected, and frankly, is finding Jewish dating to be a big disappointment, due to the lack of acceptance and constant requirement to prove their “Jewishness”?
We are so thankful for JDate… Don’t give up. That person is out there! We are living proof.
Since the pagan elements of trick-or-treating have effectively been “neutralized,” is it wrong to allow our children to participate? The Torah’s answer is “yes.” Through its prohibition of “foreign” customs, the Torah draws attention to its own uniqueness. Primitive people found themselves in an overwhelming, mysterious and threatening environment in the face of which they felt powerless and vulnerable. They created religious rituals and superstitions as a way of exerting magical influence over the forces of nature that they could not control physically. Man made religions thus reflected the fears, anxieties, hopes and fantasies of their adherents. The Torah is designed to challenge and educate human beings at the highest level of which they are capable—morally, intellectually and emotionally.
It is easy to say that luck (and a few guardian angels) brought Garrett and I together.
Ever received something like this?
The day, the dress
The bride, the groom
The joy, the tears
Will all come so soon
Professing true love
To my husband-to-be
With family and friends
All watching me
I hope the sun will
Be shining down,
Keep your fingers …