If the root of all evil is the failure to consider the existence of the other; and the root of all good is the recognition of the existence of the other, the all-purpose antidote would be the attribute of empathy – right? Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.
Your wedding day WILL be the most fabulous! Day! Of! Your! Life!
However, hindsight is 20/20. There may be elements of your wedding that you may look back on with regret or remorse. It’s never a fabulous feeling, but you should know that as long as you have love, that’s all that really matters.
Just in case, though, it might be helpful to learn what other been-there-done-that brides have to say about their weddings. The Wedding Yentas recently asked a group of married ladies: What do you wish you could go back and change about your wedding day or wedding planning experience?
The elusive Homing Pigeon is a man who reeks of wanting to get married. He can be spotted from a mile away. A light bulb goes off in a man’s mind when he wants to find a wife, and he morphs into a Homing Pigeon. He might suddenly wake up one morning and realize that all of his friends are married, everything is about couples, and he asks if you’d be alright settling in Scarsdale.
I think back to that first date when I, frankly, was on the fence (he since has told me that he was too) and I wonder what would have happened if either of us cut it off at that point. So often we are quick to judge. Think of the times when you made a quick decision – either at work or with a purchase? How happy were you in the long run? Studies show that 55% of Americans believe in love at first sight, but with a divorce rate that hovers close to that number, maybe we need to rethink our way of making decisions about a potential partner.
I keep my basic criteria for deciding whether or not to go on a second date very small…
Once, when walking out of the library at the university where I was attending graduate school, I saw a teenaged boy walk up behind an unsuspecting man and punch him in the head. As the man turned around, startled, the boy ran away. This is what is meant by not fully considering (allowing for) the existence of another human being. This is the root of all evil. In similar fashion, walking by when someone stumbles is also the root of all evil – though perhaps to a slightly lesser degree (omission versus commission).
I have nothing to do New Year’s Eve!!! Is this easy to admit? No. I only tell you because I want your sympathy, and possibly an invitation. It’s humiliating. People are quick to judge. When I told my (married) friend Karen, she said, “Oh my God, you might as well plaster an L on your forehead.” She made one of those annoying buzzer sounds and added, “Loser!”
Believe it or not, the life of the single Jewish person isn’t all nerve-wracking pain, disappointment, frustration, stress and heartache. Okay, perhaps I’m being overly optimistic. But there are a couple of positive things to be said about being single. No, really! For example, the world is filled with fascinating occupations and I’ve gained invaluable experience in most of them simply through dating. As a result, my resume is now thirty-four pages long. But I use a smaller font, so it seems more like seventeen.
I love latkes and am head over heels over sufganiyot. But, these Spanish fritters are a tasty alternative during Chanukah. Made from the classic Pate a Choux paste, these airy and delicate pastries are a snap to whip up. The dough is easy and can be made a couple of hours ahead of using.
A picture’s worth a thousand words… but 10 pictures are a waste of time. Now that Facebook® has taken over the world, when it comes to online dating profiles, people often confuse the concept of posting just a few flattering pictures with posting a whole album. I have no doubt that your pictures from your trip to Greece with you standing on the Acropolis are amazing… just remember, there’s a time and a place for them, and that place is not JDate®. When choosing which photos to put in your online dating profile, use these five rules of thumb:
I love the latke, and who doesn’t? All crispy and crackly with sizzling onions right out of the pan, the latke holds such promise. And then the whole thing goes right out the window for me when topped with jarred, beige, boring applesauce.